Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do

[bookivore]

Thomas:

I will not suggest that Thomas carve Justine's name in his back just like the Black Dagger brotherhood.  The guy might actually do it, and it's too sad.

I will not ask Thomas to 'do' Luccio's hair.  Or Murphy's. 

I will not ask Thomas for business cards to hand out at the police station.  But I might hand them out at Executive Workout (or whatever it's called).  Business girls need a good hairdresser too.

I will not ask Thomas to join in the Hunky Supernatural Guys calendar for charity that we're doing.  Or Michael, or Fix, or Carlos.  Even if some of the females think it's a really good idea.

[Quantus]

And I will not give Molly The Look and say, "I hope you will not keep my friend 'Los out too late, Apprentice." 

I will not keep the "No Boinking" rule in effect beyond what s strictly necessary for Molly's training, no matter how much I like being on Charity's good side.  It was funny while I wasn't getting any either, but now I feel kinda guilty.

[Priscellie]

I will not ask Thomas to join in the Hunky Supernatural Guys calendar for charity that we're doing.  Or Michael, or Fix, or Carlos.  Even if some of the females think it's a really good idea.

Humbug.

[GamerGirlsRock]

I will not ask Thomas to join in the Hunky Supernatural Guys calendar for charity that we're doing.  Or Michael, or Fix, or Carlos.  Even if some of the females think it's a really good idea.

While I'm sure they're all *rrrrrrrrrripped*... I'm betting all of the above have a fair piece of scarring, too.

[Delarith]

Chicks dig scars!  Just ask Luccio.

[Quantus]

I will not name my first child Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser the Third, no matter how much currency it would give them in the supernatural world.

[Miharu]

I will not name my first child Valentinez Alkalinella Xifax Sicidabohertz Gombigobilla Blue Stradivari Talentrent Pierre Andri Charton-Haymoss Ivanovici Baldeus George Doitzel Kaiser the Third, no matter how much currency it would give them in the supernatural world.

Okay, that one you will need to explain. I get the long name part allowing you plenty of conversations with demons, but why Valentinez? And isn't Alkaline(lla)? something in batteries?

[Quantus]

Okay, that one you will need to explain. I get the long name part allowing you plenty of conversations with demons, but why Valentinez? And isn't Alkaline(lla)? something in batteries?

obscure Trigun reference, sorry.  Vash the Stampede (most wanted man in the world with a huge bounty on his head) gave it as a fake name to Wolfwood on their first meeting.

[Soulless Mystic5523]

For a moment, I thought it was a Cowboy Bebop reference until I actually read the name.

[Quantus]

For a moment, I thought it was a Cowboy Bebop reference until I actually read the name.

I was going to post Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky IV, but it was so short... 

[stingray00alex]

I will not hiss "It is inevitable..." at my enemies during battle.
a) Even after the battle.
b) Or before it.

I will no longer do Johhny Depp impersonations after being shot at by Denarions and hitting a reef.

I am not allowed to use an imitation of Sith Lightning on enemies.
a) Despite the opportunity to say, "You will pay for your lack of Vision."
b) Even if my enemy happens to BE a Sith.
c) I am, however, allowed to Force Choke Nicodemus. It's the best way to kill him. But I'm not allowed to say, "Apology accepted, commander," after his lifeless corpse hits the floor.

I will not try to make a single ring of power. I'll just have to make do with as many force rings as I can jam on.

I will not use Thomas to get women who are out of my league.

I will not swell my army of Z-lord's guard to epic proportions to try and conquer Chicago.
a) Or the world.

I will not accept the mantle of Winter Knight. It would make French Kissing arkward, to say the least.

I will not let Bob possess Mouse. No Peeps theater would be safe.

I am not allowed to call my blasting rod a wand.

I am not allowed to dress up as a Wizard on Halloween.

Molly is not allowed to shower in my hotel room anymore.

[Shecky]

Heh.

If I ever do put together a spell that does something similar to a Force choke, the words I associate with it for casting will NOT be "I find your lack of faith disturbing."

[Gman]

It would be really satisfying if Harry went to Police HQ and confronted all the guys giving Murphy a hard time and did the Force Choke on them, not to kill them but to let them know he is a real wizard and to stop harrassing Murphy. He could use that calm DV voice. I doubt it will ever happen.

[Homer]

Murphey would kill him if he tried something like that.

[Dragonblood309]

I will never again ask Bob for sex advice. Even though the feeling DID return to her legs...eventually.