Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do

[Shecky]

I will never quote Zevon's Werewolves of London around Billy or Georgia, again.

"Didn't I see you having a piña colada at Trader Vic's? Yeah, I did - your hair was perfect."

[GamerGirlsRock]

If anyone asks me if I'm hungry, I will not intone, 'The red wizard needs food badly.'

OMG--Gauntlet!!!

[GamerGirlsRock]

Singing "The Lusty Month of May" will not endear me to Lily.
--or Fix.
--and especially NOT Titania.

The Mothers do not need new knitting needles.
--or yarn.
--nor do they work-for-hire.

I will not write up my last romantic encounter with Susan for Hustler.
--not even to see if it gets a reaction from Mr. Bland.

I will not refer to Susan's partner as "Jack's complete lack of surprise."

I will not suggest that the first rule of the White Council is that you do NOT talk about the White Council.
--ditto the Black Council, vampires, the Fae, etc.

I will not suggest Molly investigate whether her veil stops UV rays by wearing a Fan4 Invisible Girl bikini.

I will not suggest I fought at the battle of Jericho Hill.
--nor will I hunt for Randall Flagg, the Crimson King, or anyone named "Walter".

[Blaze]

I will never again run around naked except for my wardens cloak and pretend I am invisible.
-- especially where Murphy can see me.
--or in front of those construction guys near Housted.

[cornyphil]

I will not brag that my staff gets 53.8 DPS and gives a +57 intellect bonus

Nor will a comment on my Epic Robes.

[Quantus]

I will not brag that my staff gets 53.8 DPS and gives a +57 intellect bonus

Nor will a comment on my Epic Robes.

My Bathrobe does not Qualify as Epic robes, no matter how unique they are at council meeting. 
Nor will I claim they are "of the Magi" in any way


I will not sit on the porch whittling a new Blasting rod when Carlos comes to pick up Molly for their first date
Oh yes I will.  Michael needs backup, and he'd be too nice anyway.

[Priscellie]

I will not sit on the porch whittling a new Blasting rod when Carlos comes to pick up Molly for their first date
Oh yes I will.  Michael needs backup, and he'd be too nice anyway.

This mental image now holds a very special place in my heart.  Thank you.

[Tribblechomper]

When taking a #2 on someone else's toilet and they complain about Harry taking so long, he is not allowed to comment back with the phrase, "And this too shall pass"

a. Unless it really IS about to pass...
b. Unless I want to be hand-delivered to Mab by pun-wearied former friends, who have trussed me up like a suckling pig with an apple in my mouth and bound my limbs tighter than Morgan's attitude.

[Shecky]

This mental image now holds a very special place in my heart.  Thank you.

Too subtle for Harry. He'd be more along the lines of: "Hey, 'Los. You see that pretty girl there, the one you're about to take out? She's the daughter of my best friend, the apple of his eye, and that means if you even THINK about touching her, or kissing, or anything like that, I got no problem getting the Doom of Damocles again. Capisce?"

[blackwolf]

Too subtle for Harry. He'd be more along the lines of: "Hey, 'Los. You see that pretty girl there, the one you're about to take out? She's the daughter of my best friend, the apple of his eye, and that means if you even THINK about touching her, or kissing, or anything like that, I got no problem getting the Doom of Damocles again. Capisce?"

Two Issues with that, Bill

First He is under the Doom NOW and,
He is not really the kind of guy to use New Pop culture lines.

[Bob]

He is not really the kind of guy to use New Pop culture lines.

Yeah, he wouldn't recognize a pop culture reference if one skittered up and implanted an embryo in his esophagus.

[Shecky]

Two Issues with that, Bill

First He is under the Doom NOW and,
He is not really the kind of guy to use New Pop culture lines.

Psst - I first heard a variant on that one about 30 years ago...

[pdqsport]

He is not really the kind of guy to use New Pop culture lines.

Given where I am thinking the reference is coming from (The Godfather, if I am not mistaken) I would hardly call that a "new" pop culture line. 

[Shecky]

Two Issues with that, Bill

Who's Bill?

[Priscellie]

We already have a Richard, so that's why you're Bill.

Also, my daddy says I'm a princess.