Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do

[LordDresden]

Not to mention the Dangers if they were to start cooperating...

Somehow...I just can't see that happening, except in emergency tactical situations.  Marcone has a moral compass of a sort, Lara pawned hers decades ago.  They just wouldn't get along.

In the event of a smackdown, Marcone vs. Lara battle of wits and schemes for secret power...my money in on Marcone, after a long hard fight, or it would be except that I am not allowed to place bets on the outcome of a Lara/Marcone ultimate smackdown battle for secret control. 

I am not allowed to sell popcorn for the first time Lara attempts to defeat Marcone...personally...if you know what I mean.

If for some reason the CPD ever needs to put out an APB description of Lara Raith, I am not allowed to mention that I know where they can find some professional quality stills and video of the perp...

Once Lash returns, I am not allowed to mention casually to Lara that, "You call that temptation?! I've been tempted by an expert!" just to make Lash laugh...however, at that point I am allowed to pass on Lash's professional criticisms of Lara's technique.  In doing so, however, I am not allowed to repeat some of Lash's personal nicknames for Lara, discretion is the better part of valor, after all...

[Dragonblood309]

...Once Lash returns...

Once she returns? o_0 Has it been confirmed? Did the great and glorious Jim say she was gonna come back?

I'm not allowed to fill a paper bag with Mouses humongous leavings, put in on Larry Fowlers doorstep, light it on fire, ring the doorbell and run away.

Ditto with Lara and Marcone.

[Tribblechomper]

I'm not allowed to fill a paper bag with Mouses humongous leavings, put in on Larry Fowlers doorstep, light it on fire, ring the doorbell and run away.

Ditto with Lara and Marcone.

Nor am I allowed to contribute to the delinquency of a minor by having Molly veil me as I do the above actions

[pyroriffic]

I will remember that plastic vampire teeth may be funny in the right situation, but that situation is not necessarily in the middle of a Council meeting.

I will never again say "but what happens when Polka does die?" where Butters can hear me.

[pyroriffic]

I will never quote from the Book of Armaments when using Hellfire.
a) It is not the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.
b) I will not count to five three.

[LordDresden]

Once she returns? o_0 Has it been confirmed? Did the great and glorious Jim say she was gonna come back?

No.  I think Harry might simply have been indulging in a little wishful/hopeful thinking as he pondered that... 

Seriously, though, I can't help but wonder what Lash would think of the 'temptation technique' of people like Lara and Maeve...

[LordDresden]

I am not allowed to bring Mouse to White Council meetings, just to watch him meet Ancient Mai's stone toys...

I am not allowed to bring Mouse to White Council meetings, just on the chance that Morgan decides to tear off any bandages...

I am not allowed to bring Marcone to White Council meetings, just so he can show Langtry what effective leadership looks like...wait a minute, why exactly am I not allowed to do that?
 
I am not allowed to phone up Lord Raith and ask him if he's feeling hungry...

I am not allowed to tease Lara by pretending to offer to trade Carlos to her in exchange for information.  Likewise, I am not allowed to tell Lara that Maeve has been seen in his apartment lately.  It just leads to trouble...

I am not allowed to let Molly dye Mouse multiple colors for Halloween.  That was fun, but Stallings chewed me out for days afterward about all the reports of a 'rainbow-colored giant monster' in the steeets...

I am not allowed to ask Lara what she knows about my mother, even though they almost certainly knew each other.  Mostly because I'm afraid of what she'll tell me...

Charity and I are not allowed to weird everybody out by suddenly acting like best friends...even though it would make Molly crazy...

When Lara and her sisters are out for a 'girls night out', I am not allowed to 'happen' to let Bob out for a 'spirit's night on the town' at the same time.  The total destruction of the city of Chicago is too high a price for a laugh.

[Raestlin]

I am not allowed to let Bob attend Mardi Gras.....the destruction of the city would surely be noticed.

[LordDresden]

If it should happen, during my monthly Council/Court diplomatic meeting with Lara, that the song "Girls Just Want To Have Fun" comes on the radio, I am not allowed to immediately hurl fire at her.  A warning glare is required first, fire is used only if she refuses to take a hint.

[Dragonblood309]

I shall not make a giant soulfire hand to show the person who just cut me off on the highway how I feel about them.

Nor shall I use it to catch fly balls at baseball games.

[Maltese Falcon]

I shall not make a giant soulfire hand to show the person who just cut me off on the highway how I feel about them.

Nor shall I use it to catch fly balls baseball games.

I will also never make said soul fire hand and tell a doctor no this is a prostate exam.

[Gallowglass]

I am not allowed to create the giant soul hand and do my best 'Otter' look as you say 'Not that good?".  If you don't understand, you are way to young.

[Raestlin]

I am not allowed to start dancing if "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" by Trace Adkins comes on the radio when I am meeting with Murphy.....I dont want to get a broken wrist....

[LordDresden]

I am not allowed to start dancing if "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" by Trace Adkins comes on the radio when I am meeting with Murphy.....I dont want to get a broken wrist....

Actually that sounds more like a shooting offense!  (It might be that I got a little sick of that song when I heard it for the 1,205,385th time.)

I am not allowed to get drunk, call up Titania at 3:00 am, and ask her, "It's 3:00 am, do you know where your daughter is?"

I am not allowed to get drunk, call up Mab at 3:00 am, and tell her, "It's 3:00 am and I know where your daughter is..."

[Gallowglass]

I am not allowed to get drunk and tell Murphy I know Mab or Titania's phone numbers.

I am not allowed to get drunk and make appointments for Mab, Titania or Lara at Toe-moss's salon.  At least without getting some old fashioned crank cameras in place first.

I am not allowed to go to a friend's child's christening and give them a 'Little Wizzard' hat.  Especially if it is Murphy's sisters kid.

I am not allowed to teach or allow Molly how to cast the illusion of herself pregnant to flip out her parents.

I am not not allowed to teach Molly how to cast the illusion that her belly is flat either or to have bigger breasts, in fact, no illusory plastic surgery at all.  Bad thing to get Charity mad at me for her daughter's sudden 44dd's.

I am not allowed to give Ivy a t-shirt that says, 'I know everything, so don't bother', to wear to school or for her tutor.

I can give her a t-shirt that says, 'No it's Not' when a boy starts hitting on her and bragging about a certain something.  Even better, I can give such a boyfriend a nice white t-shirt with a bull's eye on it and a bullet to Kincaid when she hits dating age.




Murphy's sister's ba