Shall I Compare Thee To A Mooseburger aka The Bad Poetry Thread

[angel relic]

Sleep, O Sleep, where did thy flap?
gone south for the winter
to nest in Chilean lap?

Rest, O Rest, how can you betray?
a stressed out Angel
with no paid holiday.

Dormius Dorme, bonk me now
send me a wizard
to smooth furrowed brow.

Dreams, O dreams, where do thy lay
if not in my head,
then where do you stay?

Pickles O Pickles, and rocky road delight,
why do you fight
and bring sleepless night!

 

[Ms Duck]

for sleep, to sleep, young boys, need a good fap
search now, the web, for boobs, arse and crap
it is ninety, per cent,
so search the interntet
and now, truth told, Auntie Duck shall flap

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNARJPNz2CA

[angel relic]

Crappy porn and Sesame skit
have robbed my senses
of reasonable wit.

I sought a balm for troubled luck
Instead I get
flapped by Duck.

Help me! Help me! and so I go
Online to see
a donkey show.

Disturbed but inspired by Duck's sage advice
I seduce my pillow
and think "Feathers....nice!"
 

[Ms Duck]

bumpity bump, bumpity bump
duck bumps thump thump thump
a lil push
kick da tush
ewww wipe after you dump

[Piotr1600]

I write my wretched poetry in the little black book of my brain
whist washing the dishes and cleaning the drain

So, when my little grey kitty jumps up and bawls for TREATS
in the middle of my cleaning, scrubbing, and rinsing feats

I must quickly answer her summoning of de-lish-us-ness
Or bright and early - in my shoe - I find a gooey mess

She loves me, I try to convince myself, frequently
by gifting me with hairballs from her collection, see?

[j3nnee]

(stolen from a book I like)

Ruth and Johnny Side by Side
Went out for an auto ride

They hit a bump Ruth hit a tree
and John kept rolling ruthlessly

(also stolen from said book)

It isn't the cough
that carries you off
It's the coffin
They carry you off in

[Ms Duck]

"cats they land on their feet" did duck mutter
"and toast allways on the side with the butter"
so she glued A to the B
tosssed up great glee
and the motion device did perpetually flutter

[Blaze]

If only it could be that
buttered toast and falling cat
were hooked to Robert's Van de Graaf
We'd all be charged, with a good laugh.

Spinning cat with cooling bread
In Schrodinger's box, alive and dead!
Vortex feline so sublime
outside of both space and time.

[Piotr1600]

Wearing lenses of protective glass
and a protective Nomex wrap for their ass

Researchers, some cackling with glee
push buttons and throw switches willy-nilly

The LHC buzzes and groans
in the distance krell metal moans

Targeted beams soon clash at 7 TeV levels
making quite a racket - loud as the devil!

But scientists, technicians, and engineers too
suddenly stop to ponder - well, some go to the loo

"If Duck and Blaze's box-bound, spinning buttered toast cat
is creating juice outside of time and space - then where the hell is it at?"

[KarlTenBrew]

(I have actually used this or a variation thereof in multiple places as an example of 'bad' [annoying] peotry)

What would you do,
if for a time:
you were forced!
to speak...in rhyme?

Not poetic and
flowing verse,
just rhyming stanzas
unrehearsed.

'Tis enough
to drive one mad,
nay: to death!
(for which those near be glad)

[j3nnee]

It's really cold
This Tuesday eve
Here in the state of Texas

Mother Nature is bold
Father Winter has nerve
And snow may fall soon after

brrr!

[Ms Duck]

I'm a Duck
here me quack
 send the Daleks
to Aaaa Tack !

we're being silly on Butcher dot coooom !

This is Angel
He's a Relic
with a stash
like Tom Sellic

we're being silly on Butcher dot coooom !

weve got divine
named Priscellie
like a crepes
fills her belly

we're being silly on Butcher dot coooom !

As for Blaze
our own Bard
thread bout p3^!$
long and hard

we're being silly on Butcher dot coooom !

(c'mon yall join in) 

[Blaze]

Ms Duck makes a splash where the water is fine,
Evoking with names like Relic's, and mine,
Hey, y'all come on in, join me for a nice swim
Here at the dot com of Butcher comma Jim.

Sing hey-o Sing hey-o pass the mustard and mayo
Sing hee-o Sing hee-o time for frivolity-o.

There's J3nnee, and Piotr and who else do I see?
A poet named KarlTen, our snark meister Shecky.
Sporadically Yeratel's sparsely spits out haiku
Sort of like Quantus, and quotes that Lavin Chen will do.

Sing Hi-o Sing hi-o and please pass me a pun,
Sing me-o Sing my-o you son of a gun.

Frogge and Katty both sweet lurkers can be
Reading and plotting when a posting we'll see
From the fan base of base ganglial rhyme
Will on the page appear from time to time.

Sing Kee-o Sing kee-o when will that be so
we know that aren't a self serving lot?

Sing Kai-o Sing Kai-o and dance low heel and high toe
from Shikkago to Kyoto where all bad poets stop.



 

[angel relic]

*fights against writers block*

DAMNIT!...

Nope...got nuthin.

[Blaze]

angel relic fights
against his writers block
damnit, got nothing.