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Messages - Anduriel

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Author Craft / Re: New Writer's Group from this Board
« on: July 24, 2008, 03:45:35 PM »
I'd be intereted in joining such a writers BB. Haven't taught, but have been taught screenwriting, if that couints at all...

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Author Craft / Re: One Word Story Game
« on: April 20, 2008, 11:55:32 AM »
Vindication awoke hungover, disgruntled and proceeded to emasculate another abbreviated news clip.  Exasperated with tiresome drivel constantly quoting Garfield he searched in vain for immaculate reporting.  Valiantly ignoring vivacious vixens with the biggest, loudest dance-routines, he decided not to apply logic, rather to invoke vainglorious abortions of dogmatic speeches that did exterminate any chance and distinguished Camembert from those devious dairy turncoats.  What the hell!  Flinging a piece of Havarti and starting a stirring of goulash, he felt intensely satisfied that he wasn't medicated; however, his defenestration and subsequent resurrection memory-loss had constructed a tuba symphony.  This unwittingly surprised him. So much unexpected noise! Drastic measures would do nothing for her acceptance, nor his sanity. Therefore certain measures would unfortunately cause Galactic Conquest Cornelia cartoonists considerable consternation.  Conversely, Armageddon happened.

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 20, 2008, 12:24:59 AM »
Quote
We stepped out as one.

Joey

This would have looked much cooler if Rocky Bal-lava hadn’t flown back into the air, leaving us stranded. Hitting a moving target is hard. Trying to hit a moving target that can fly, whilst you have no projectiles, is just a joke.

“Uh, anybody know what that is?”

“Garathmor.” Was Andre’s reply; as if that should explain everything.

It didn’t.

“A freaking lava demon!?!” Debbie exclaimed as she explained “But only He has access to those…”

“Oh.” Master of linguistics; that’s me.

By this time, the demon was high in the air, and it looked as though another fireball was in the making. Andre cursed loudly.

“I can’t sling spells and protect us at the same time, not enough magic here. Debyone, are you strong?”

“I’ve got enough energy, but… you know I suck at target practice. Plus it’s a demon, aren’t they impervious to magics?”

At that moment Carrolton broke formation and went to the trunk of her SUV.

“I think I may be able to help there.”

When she returned, she was packing an honest to god rocket launcher. I swear.

                                                                ***

Meanwhile

Reza

                              Somewhere on Wildfire

Explanations.

There comes a time in every person’s life, when an explanation is demanded of them; a detailed reasoning as to the results of a certain set of events. It was my turn to make such an explanation. Which is why after Debyone and Andreska departed, I was summoned here; to mount T’orth Kuru.

T’orth Kuru is a grand mountain set deep in the valleys of Londorn. Deep set into this mountain is a maze of catacombs and at the end of one tunnel is a chamber. Now this chamber has seen many a purpose over the eons, first and foremost a door to an inter-dimensional gateway.

There also comes a time in one’s life when you must choose a side, choose your allegiance in the battles to come. There are more forces vying for the worlds than just the emperor. I have chosen my side. And now I must pay my dues.

She was already here before I arrived at the mountain. She had been waiting for me, though I could not see Her.

A chilling voice rang throughout the cavern. Feminine, a voice one could feel as much as hear, it was as sweet as it was foreboding.

“You know why you have been summoned here, child of Wildfire?”

“I do.”

“Then let us begin.”

I had told Mr Gardner that either way, whatever the outcome; I would win.

I had lied.

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 16, 2008, 01:39:59 AM »
Meanwhile

Joey

Ok, so I’d done well with the whole not puking my guts out thing, but now they were expecting me to do real police work. In case you couldn’t guess; that’s something I haven’t done before. Ever. I didn’t know where to begin, I mean even with all the cop shows I watched; I was hardly crime scene investigation material…

And so I said the first words that came into my head:

“Actually Ms Carrolton, I am the psychic vibe,” I received a quizzical look from Frances “I’m DSC’s new psychic consultant.”

Big mistake.

If it was possible; Sarah Carrolton’s disapproving look deepened, until she looked like something resembling a bullfrog on ‘that time of the month’.

“Is that so?” She glanced at Detective Frances… I never did learn his first name; come to think of it “I didn’t think Interpol employed such means.”

I retorted with a most cunning:

“Uh…”

“Well Mr Capp, how about you give us all your professional opinion?”

Did I mention I’m really not psychic? It seemed I was however, kinda stupid. One of these days I was gonna learn to keep my mouth tightly shut. Seeing as this wasn’t ‘one of those days’; I just stood there looking stupid. Thankfully Frances came to my rescue:

“Ms Carrolton, if you’ve quite finished grilling the newest member of my staff, I think it’s time you left.”

“I certainly will n¬”

“Sarah, need I remind you that no matter who you represent unofficially, legally speaking you are just an insurance flunky, where as I am an officer with Interpol,” He fixed her with a milk-curdling stare “You leave when I say you leave. Unless you are waiting for an armed escort?”

If looks could kill; Frances would have exploded at that very moment. Ms Carrolton did not look pleased. She paused. As if contemplating whether to challenge Frances on this notion, but thought better of it.

“It is of no consequence. I have already completed my investigation.”

With that; she left.
“Finally, I thought she’d never get her fine ass out of here,” was all he had to say before standing up. “You fancy doing some actual work now? Tell me kid, you ever heard of a skin-walker?”

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Author Craft / Re: Any Suggestions?
« on: April 16, 2008, 12:27:53 AM »
Yeah, are you contracted with a specific artist, have they given, you a brief on characters, plot etc?

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 11, 2008, 06:49:52 AM »
“So Sarah, why are you here? Tell me you don’t think the vic could’ve done this to himself?” Frances taunted the ‘insurance’ lady.

She gave him a look that said You know why I’m here before actually saying:

“Vic?” her tone a little incredulous.

“Vic-tim, Sarah,” he let out a little sigh “Victim. That’s cop-talk for the bag of bones that used to be our…guy…that isn’t there any more!?”

Francis stalked over to a corner of the room where an outline of something had been taped. If that was supposed to be where the guy had died, whatever had killed him, didn’t leave him like much of a man…  or much of an anything really. The outline just looked like a large blob. Francis was still talking, he seemed a little bemused.

“Ms Carrolton, would you mind explaining why the body that the DSC specifically requested would stay on scene for 24hours, is no longer on my scene? You know there’s tests that need conducting while the body’s still on location.”

Why would an insurance lady have anything to do with the actual body?

“Detective Frances, surely you know the story about the early bird and the worm? I got my worm,” she said smugly “The tests have already been conducted, just not by you.”

For some crazy reason I can’t explain right now, I was starting to expect that our Ms Carrolton worked for an insurance company just about as much as I had passed my Interpol entrance exam. Can’t think why.

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 09, 2008, 11:50:23 PM »
Quote
I smiled. So, Detective Frances DID know what it was like to be the Wild-bound.

I took another swig of water. Now it seemed I was more like Virgin King; Protector of the Universe. Ok, I really gotta think of a cooler name for myself; like Frank. It was odd sitting talking with another Wild-bound, made me wonder if he had known Debbie and Andre. As usual, there were more questioned raised than answered.

“Ok, so I’m like the new sheriff in town, but what happens when I’m… not in town? Or not on this planet for  that matter?”

Sure, I had power, but I couldn’t be everywhere at once.

“That’s where folks like me come in,” Francis replied “Guys in the know who ain’t gonna stand by and let some supernatural asshole tare up our planet.”

“Guys like you?”

“Yeah, seems destiny had other plans for this wild-candidate, got me a wife and kids now. But that only makes our job more pressing. People like us, we‘re the guardians of this plain, the guardians of Earth.”

“So this Wild-bound gig isn’t a lifelong deal…”

Now that was interesting.

“It lasts as long as the Wildflower needs you, then you move on to the next part. Destiny works in strange ways for guys like us.”

“Guys like us?”

“Yeah, y’know; descendants.”

“Descendants?”

“Uhuh,” he said before letting out a little chuckle “There an echo in here or somethin’?

I was doing a pretty good parrot impression by this point, but my blank expression must have told all.

“Uh, they didn’t tell you about that? Oh boy…”

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 09, 2008, 12:01:20 PM »
Quote
With that, well, I guess the best comparison I can make is that I clicked my ruby slippers and willed myself home.

Except, home wasn’t where I ended up. Sure, I was back on earth, my town, my street, but my home wasn’t there. Where my house had been, there was now just a square plot of empty land. The earth was all cracked and dry with a few pieces of rubble scattered about, but that was it. For the gazillionth time since this whole shebang started; I just stood there gawping. What had happened? Now I know I’d just spent time in magical gaga-googoo  land, but here on earth; buildings don’t just disappear.

“Mr Gardner?” A gruff male voice called out from behind me.

Agh!

Would people please stop sneaking up on me!?

“Mr Joey Gardner?”

I turned around to see a guy 5’9, with ebony skin, dressed in a brown pants and a white shirt with no suit jacket. Instead he wore a long brown raincoat. A vibrantly red tie that seemed just a little out of place with the rest, set off the ensemble. The man looked to be in his early 40s with short cropped hair, and he was stalking towards me. Now if I was a certain character from a certain urban-fantasy series I had been reading recently, I’m sure I would have come up with a really clever and witty reply. All I managed was:

“Uh…”   

He seemed to take that as a yes.

“Mr Gardner, I’m Detective Inspector Frances,” he said as he flashed me his badge “And we need to have a little chat.”

Shit.

(AN: It's a little short but for some reason I just couldn't resist.)

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Author Craft / Re: Writers round table
« on: April 09, 2008, 12:35:05 AM »
Quote
"That's super, Humbert, heal me.  It freaking hurts everywhere."

Sometime in between my left shoulder being pushed back into it’s socket, my right knee being relocated and the pain in my head went from feeling like a jumbo jet had been dropped on it to just an elephant dancing a merry jig; Debbie had shimmered from down from what was left of the fortress and was tending to Andre. Even through the pain, it was indescribably good to see Debbie and knowing she was ok. Unimaginable relief flooded through my body at the realisation that we were all alive… or maybe that was just the healing magics.

Humbert was surprisingly good at this healing gig and Debbie seemed to be doing just fine with her father. In. very little time at all; the pain had subsided enough for both Andre and I to sit up.

“You should rest master Gardner,” said Humbert “Your body is still weak, as is Andre’s.”

“I still can’t believe you cut off my hand boy!” replied Andre.

That’s right; I save his life, and all the ungrateful ass can do is complain about the little things.

“Can’t you just re-grow it or something?” I said, a smile crept onto my face. “Or maybe you could attach a nice hook? Andre the pirate!”

I received a vicious glare in return for my musings. Well, it looked like we’d saved the day… and a world, which is more than I usually did, so it’s safe to say I was feeling pretty proud of myself, but that only lasted for a while because Andre piped up with:

“So Debyone, which world should we travel to next?”

“Andre, no. Now you know me; I’m always up for some ass-kicking action and I enjoy liberating as much as the next planetary-enslaved mage, but you need to rest. It was a miracle you didn’t die.” was her reply.

Though neither had said it, the relief that that the other was alive and their love was more than apparent in their eyes. My own orbs of jelly only belied more questions. Questions of which I promptly voiced.

“Yeah what’s up with this liberating worlds thing? The Emperor’s dead… isn’t our job done?”

And then I heard a voice that made my balls try to crawl back up into my body.

“Not quite Mr Gardner. If I’m correct your work has only just begun.”

Reza!

Damn. Now where did she come from?

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 08, 2008, 01:16:16 AM »
Well I shall take that as a compliment lol.

And I will endevour to work on these ideas and see where the road takes me!

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 07, 2008, 11:36:54 PM »
Aw man, I'm sure you don't suck. And thanks :-) I shall see where this road takes me.

I'm not so great myself though, I have faults. Like my constant search for validation! lol. I mean what did you think of my lil reinactment (I know there wasn't much to go with)... if you don't mind me asking. I'm just intrigued.

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 07, 2008, 10:37:29 PM »
LMFAO! Totally hilarious! Something like this huh?


'And so I appeared unto him, to deliver my oh so holy message. And I’ll tell you this; I could oh so not be bothered. But I had a job to do, and… I did.

“Ahem… I… I come baring news for you worthy mor¬”

“Oh Holy sacred Cow! You have come to absolve me of all the great baddnesses of my life and bring us many pleasures into our village.”

“Mortal¬ I…what?”

Did he just call me a cow?!

“Oh sacred Cow, let me here drink the holy milk from your sacred udders.”

“W-what? Get off of¬”

It was whilst I was trying to remove the crazy man from my udders, that I noticed I actually had udders. I went to find the nearest mirror… or reflective surface, and there I was in all my glory.

A freaking cow!

I hate my job.'


Lol aw you made me giggle with that idea. You got some cool ideas, I think maybe you'd be better off writing it  ;D (Hopefully that sound like the compliment I intended)

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 07, 2008, 10:14:06 PM »
Ah awesome, I shall look the book up. And nah, never watched much. I did see part of an episode where some dude was in a goldy brown space-suit type thing, then it opened up and a glowing thing with wings came out of it. One of those unique angels you were talking about?

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 07, 2008, 09:49:25 PM »
It's an interesting subject I know, and have delved into it before. However I'm not sure I want to be... religioun specific. Rather have a whole bunch of ideas running at the same time...

Could present a problem.

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Author Craft / Re: Seeking help. Am I just one giant walking cliché?
« on: April 07, 2008, 08:52:21 PM »
Nice ideas ;)

I think I will very much take your advice and get some ideas a-rolling.

I do like the idea of having multple pantheons and seeing where that goes. Again to quote something from the great Master JB... or rather paraphrase about teh story of the 3 blind men and the elephant, they were all right and all wrong; they just couldn't see the whole picture (Death Masks).

Just gotta put my own spin on things. Gotta get with the research!

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