Try it in Ireland, in Germany and in Indonesia and it won't get the same response.  Social consturcts, nothing more, and social constructs are our choices and therefore our responsibilities, which is why I get a bit hot under the collar to see the ones we happen to have now reinforced as if they were a) unalterable and b) positive.

Theres a joke in Chinese about a man who goes to a noodle shop in a neighboring province and asks for a bowl of soup. The words for sex and soup sound alike in Cantonise and Mandarin so Chinese people laugh when they hear it. I didn't laugh because I don't speak Chinese (till it was translated for me anyway). Thats ok because the audience at the time did speak Chinese (one or the other). You could get upset because the woman was working as a waitress instead of being a CEO somewhere else. You can get upset because the guy wasn't sensitive enough to know what he was asking was inappropiate. Or, like us, you could just laugh because life is short and the point of the story wasn't the predefined roles (if there are any left) that we find ourselves in, but how misunderstanding or lack of good communication can in fact be funny.
I hope you find something to laugh about in life, but I'm beginning to think you don't.

Cliches about what "men" and "women" are like in place of characterising them as individuals won't make me dislike a character, necessarily, but it will make me dislike the author and most likely never read anything else of theirs again.

I wasn't suggesting not developing characters... chill out. I could walk up to nearly any man and tell him that story about my wife and, unless he was psychotic or had never dated in his life, chanced are that he would laugh. He wouldn't laugh because he knows me as an individual but because he's probably been through the same thing to some degree. Notice the Jeff Foxworthy quote above. Theres a reason its funny. Theres a reason Foxworthy can deliver that line with a crowd of men and women and get a laugh. Because the audience can relate it to their lives and experiences.

Personally, I don't think there's anything wrong with cliches so long as they're interesting. Without the magic and monsters Harry would be just another gumshoe. Its boring work (my dad's a PI so I know). A down on his luck gumshoe, can't get much more cliche than that. Through in the magic, its gets more interesting. A few character faults, a series of events, a vampire or two, next thing you know I can't put the book down.

Aside from the "dead ender" stuff (things so bad you could never live with this person), I can't stand when a woman asks me for my opinion knowing full well she won't like it. Case in point.
"which dress do you think I should wear?"
"You know I hate this game, why don't you ask which dress I hate the most so you can just pick that one. You'll look beautiful no matter what you choose and you'll never pick what I recomend anyway. "
"No, I'm serious. Tell me which one you like. Theres only three. Which one do you like the most."
"Are you sure about this, you really care what my opinion is?"
"Of course I do, otherwise I wouldn't ask you"
"I like the red one. It sets off your hair and everything, its dead sexy."
"oh, wait what about this one" (goes to get another dress, comes back with two, then demands my attention again because my opinion is sooo very important)
"I still like the red one the best. If you don't want to wear it, the silver one would look good as well."
"I'm not sure, what about this green one"
"I think that would look fantastic.. on my grandmother" (then immediately feel chagrined because this is not funny, its serious, we need to leave soon and she needs my help. She tells me this with her eyes. She also tells me she will remember this for at least a week)
"You're going to look beautiful no matter what dress you wear (it was worth a shot, but shes still going to remember). If you don't like the first two I mentioned, wear the black dress. Its classy, beautiful, you'll look great."
...
skip to the end. She wears none of the dresses I picked. She still looks beautiful and still doesn't feel the least bit fazed that she chose to wear the one dress that I didn't mention. I've tried picking them in reverse from dresses to lamps to colors to freaking food in the grocery store. It doesn't seem to matter. Its always the last thing I would pick. Of course, we divorced (unrelated reasons), so its some other poor fools problem now.