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Author Topic: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do  (Read 253604 times)

Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #465 on: September 09, 2008, 08:19:06 PM »
Quote from: Blitz on April 10, 2008, 06:31:27 AM


It is not okay to make up imaginary friends to replace Lash.
a) My subconscious is scary enough without giving him more people to chat with.


Besides, Lash seems like she might be the jealous type... :D 8)
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Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #466 on: September 09, 2008, 08:20:47 PM »
Quote from: Sameth on April 10, 2008, 01:48:39 PM
-I will not threaten Mab with getting Aslan to deal with her.
a) No matter how funny I think it is.


On the other hand, for some reason nobody laughs when Michael does it...
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Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #467 on: September 09, 2008, 08:36:10 PM »
Quote from: drache on April 15, 2008, 09:45:04 PM

a I will not annony Mac in general[/spoiler]

Hmmm...actually, on balance that isn't that funny.  I wouldn't be a bit surprised if it turned out at the end of the series that Mac is the most powerful being Harry's ever met, or something.
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Offline Raestlin

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #468 on: September 09, 2008, 10:02:36 PM »
I will not tell Mac that I like to refrigerate his brew
  a. because i do not want to get banned again.
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Those who can not remembe the past are doomed to think that "racial profiling" is worse than the death of thousands of innocent people.

In memorium 9/11

Offline Brian

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #469 on: September 09, 2008, 10:29:22 PM »
I will not move most of the books from the wicca section of Borders to the fantasy section.

Even though they really belong there.

Or the rest to the self help section.
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At this rate I wouldn't be able to afford to protect mankind from the perils of black magic.  Hell's bells, that would be really embarrassing.

Offline Raestlin

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #470 on: September 09, 2008, 10:58:56 PM »
I will not tell Michael that I attend AA meetings.....(Agnostics Anonymous)
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Those who can not remembe the past are doomed to think that "racial profiling" is worse than the death of thousands of innocent people.

In memorium 9/11

Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #471 on: September 10, 2008, 07:45:55 AM »
Quote from: Half man-half amazing on July 04, 2008, 04:19:11 AM
Not allowed to get Murphy, Luccio, and Elane into a 3 way mud/ pudding match and post it on pay perview and have ring side seats to the event.

However, if someone else were to arrange it, Marcone is prepared to split the ticket profits if a certain wizard looks the other way (or pretends to, he's only human)...
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Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #472 on: September 10, 2008, 07:51:18 AM »
Quote from: Gman on July 05, 2008, 01:20:31 AM
Harry can't invite Titania and Mab over for a threesome.

On the other hand, if Mab wants him to pay off the last favor that way and arranges it herself, that's OK.

In that event, however, Harry is not allowed to sing "I'm in love with Maeve's Mom" around Mab's daughter afterward...even if her reaction would probably be kind of funny.

"MOOOMMMMM!"
« Last Edit: September 10, 2008, 08:06:15 AM by LordDresden »
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Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #473 on: September 10, 2008, 08:21:36 AM »
Harry is not allowed to court and marry Marion Murphy just because he wants some decent food.  On the other hand, if she comes on to him, anything goes.

Harry is not allowed to to whisper "Aloha, you half-monster bastard" in Kincaid's ear when when Kincaid is on the edge of death.  It makes Ivy unhappy.

Harry is not allowed to hum "Afternoon Delights" during his monthly diplomatic meeting with Lara Raith.  While it is a cute tune, it sets the wrong tone and could get him killed.

Harry is not allowed to hum "England swings" endlessly in an attempt to try and goad the Merlin into trying to break the First Law.

Harry is not allowed to use magic to help Butters win the polka contest again this year.  The Council passed a whole new Law of Magic about that...

Harry is not allowed to slip Karrin a dose of Three-eye just before her date with Kincaid...

The next time Kincaid and Murphy go to Hawaii, Harry is not allowed to mail a manila envelope full of incriminating evidence about Kincaid to McGarrett.  That's Ebenezar's job...deniability is everything.










« Last Edit: September 10, 2008, 08:28:50 AM by LordDresden »
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Offline Priscellie

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #474 on: September 10, 2008, 11:28:28 AM »
These are great, everyone, but please keep these in first-person, as is the standard format.  Use the posts on the first few pages as a guide! :D
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Offline Noey

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #475 on: September 10, 2008, 12:26:01 PM »
Quote from: LordDresden on September 10, 2008, 07:51:18 AM
On the other hand, if Mab wants him to pay off the last favor that way and arranges it herself, that's OK.

In that event, however, Harry is not allowed to sing "I'm in love with Maeve's Mom" around Mab's daughter afterward...even if her reaction would probably be kind of funny.
"MOOOMMMMM!"

Related, I am not allowed to hum, "Maeve's Mom Has Got It Goin' On".
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Offline Raestlin

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #476 on: September 10, 2008, 01:35:37 PM »
I am not allowed to hum the song Mountain Music around Ebenezar
  a. If I want to go on living that is....
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Those who can not remembe the past are doomed to think that "racial profiling" is worse than the death of thousands of innocent people.

In memorium 9/11

Offline Dragonblood309

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #477 on: September 10, 2008, 03:07:57 PM »
I am not allowed to shove swords into rocks in an attempt to get rid of them.

Likewise I'm not allowed to chuck them into Lake Michigan in the hope that the lady of the lake will do my job for me.
a)Besides, some watery tart lying in ponds, chucking swords at people is no basis for a system of government. True power is derived from the masses. Not some farcical aquatic cerimony.  ;)

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Offline Murphy's Stunt Double

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #478 on: September 10, 2008, 05:20:40 PM »
Acceptable formats:

Quote from: Priscellie on April 09, 2008, 03:52:26 AM

- I am not allowed to ...
- I will never ...
- Bob's skull (fill in the blank)  is not to be used to...

- Under no circumstances am I to even contemplate ...
- Just because something is (fill in the blank) doesn't mean (fill in the blank).

- (Fill in the blank) is not a (fill in the blank).


Etc. You get the hint.
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Offline LordDresden

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Re: Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do
« Reply #479 on: September 10, 2008, 06:16:25 PM »
Quote from: Noey on September 10, 2008, 12:26:01 PM
Related, I am not allowed to hum, "Maeve's Mom Has Got It Goin' On".

In the aftermath of the threesome, for that matter I am not allowed to sing it around Elaine, Luccio, Susan, Karrin, or Lash, either.  For some reason none of them seem to find it funny.

No, none of them think 'Fire and Ice' is funny, either.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2008, 06:22:33 PM by LordDresden »
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