Things Harry Dresden Is No Longer Allowed to Do

[Delarith]

I will not ask any woman in my life to rip off her clothes, jump on top of me shimmying saying "Do me baby!" no matter how much I want to.

[Quantus]

I will not ask any woman in my life to rip off her clothes, jump on top of me shimmying saying "Do me baby!" no matter how much I want to.

-And I will be properly suspicious of any woman who does, rather than thinking of how many years it been sinc-  Stop it Harry!

[Half man-half amazing]

I will not take Thomas with me when I go see Maeve... Things might get really weird.

Bob and Thomas are not allowed to be in the same room together w/o my knowlege.

Murphy is not small.... she is travel size.(ouch damnit Murph I was kidding)

Will not challenge McCoy or Rwalings to a drinking contest with Mac's ale.
  -or Rameriz
  -or Murphy
     -she gets mean when she is drunk and she is a sore loser

Will not say"ooh baby toy!!" when Murphy bust out her hand cuffs.

Not allowed to go see Lara anymore
  Luccio might not like that
  Lara might try to eat me

Never introduce Lara and Luccio on a personal level
-cat fight might follow
-second though that might not be such a bad idea

Dont leave Murphy alone with Luccio for any length of time
 -They may be shairing storys about me
 -I might miss a cat fight and after wards they both might tag team me.
 -They might just tag team me anyway.

Bob is not allowed to be in my head when Luccio is over
-or anyother time
-and is not allowed to meet luccio at all.

[Lady Knight Ignus]

In the event that Ivy, Murphy, any Carpenter kid, any other children, or some combination thereof are kidnapped, upon learning the news I am absolutely forbidden from breaking out in a chorus of They're Taking the Hobbits to Isengard.

Especially if Arctis Tor figures into the picture in any way.

[Priscellie]

In the event that Ivy, Murphy, any Carpenter kid, any other children, or some combination thereof are kidnapped, upon learning the news I am absolutely forbidden from breaking out in a chorus of They're Taking the Hobbits to Isengard.

Especially if Arctis Tor figures into the picture in any way.

I think I hurt something laughing at that...

[bleet08]

"I can not use any spells to go around blowing skirts up, regardless of how much the woman looks like Marylin Monroe."

"I need to remember to not sing 'Were off to see the wonderful wizard of Oz' next time I ride with Ebeneezer.  The Merlin hears it."

[drache]

I am forbidden from making Denarian Candy coins and passing them out on Halloween to trick or treaters.

I will not walk around city hall as 'stress relief.....again
a) even though it was funny watching Rudolph and his boss ran around with thier pants on fire due to cell phone explosion

[Cbarrett]

When visiting the summer fae, june is NOT busting out all over.
    (Wonders if anyone will get the ref)

Mab is not the official spokeswoman for Dentyne Ice.
      -Nor should I ask her for some refreshing flavor

Just because I painted a phonebooth blue doesn't give me permission to break the law of time.
      -Nor should I enchant my trash can to say "EX-TEEERMIINAAATE!"
             -Giving my elderly neighbors a heart attack isn't terribly nice
      -In a similar vein, Thomas is not to be referred to as Captain Jack

[rtag]

Just because I painted a phonebooth blue doesn't give me permission to break the law of time.
      -Nor should I enchant my trash can to say "EX-TEEERMIINAAATE!"
             -Giving my elderly neighbors a heart attack isn't terribly nice
      -In a similar vein, Thomas is not to be referred to as Captain Jack

I think I'll never be able to think of Captain Jack without thinking of Thomas now. That is so perfect.

[Shecky]

I think I'll never be able to think of Captain Jack without thinking of Thomas now. That is so perfect.

Why is the *um always gone?

[tacomamafia]

I will not point at the Gatekeeper and yell, "We've found Osama!" in the middle of council meetings.
a.) Again.
b.) Even though seeing the ultimate smackdown between Uncle Eb and the Gatekeeper was pretty awesome.


I will not allow Toot-Toot and Za Guard to play among Little Chicago.
a.) Not after the "sighting of the 100-foot tooth fairy" attacking Uno's.
b.) And I thought the lawsuit from the producers was bad....

[Noey]

I will not stare intently at Little Chicago and yell, 'Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!'
- Nor can Molly float in the air while singing and dancing to Calypso songs.

[Spectacular Sameth]

-I'm not allowed to refer to Butters are my comic relief.
a) Nor am I Murphy's comic relief.

[Cbarrett]

Why is the *um always gone?

Different Captain Jack, but still funny.

OT:

The Chicago Marina is not an appropriate place to re-enact Pirates of the Carribean
              -Or that movie that I accidentally grabbed rated 18+
             

[Levi]

I will not suggest to Mab that Vanilla Ice would make a great Winter Knight.
- Nor to make Ice, Ice baby the default theme song for Winter.