Writers round table

[Qualapec]

"Yes, that's what it was" I said patienty as if I was talking to a child, then it dawned on me what she had just implied, "What was it really?"

She was gorgeous, smooth black hair and dark chocolate skin. Her tight, leather outfit made dark of her skin stand out. If it wasn't for the fact that my situation was clearly one of intense physical endangerment I might have been very attracted...which I wasn't. Not in the least. She opened her mouth to speak, then stopped, coming up with an alternative course of action. As if it would be more ammusing to leave me in the dark. "Oh...It doesn't matter much at this point. Your trial's scheduled for tommorow. And your execution is sheduled for the day after." Good god, at least innocent until proven guilty was an interdimensional constant. Like rats or flesh eating bacteria.

"As a matter of fact," She continued, "you'll be going at the same time as this poor bastard." She motioned to the cell across the hall from mine.

A man lay against the wall, either sleeping, dying or both, hard to tell due to his face being obstructed by a hat pulled down around his eyes. He was probably a little bit older than me with feathery blond hair that severely needed a combing. Almost like my own hair with the exception of color. He also needed a shave. It was one of those situations where he hadn't gone long enough for it to look good.

I blinked up at her, more people than just Debbie? I wondered if he was as innocent as I was. She hadn't acted alone, "How many?"

She sighed tiredly and shrugged, "Enough so that the blocks are busy."

"Yeah, and who are you? The secretary?" I was feeling beligerant.

She gave another, sweet smile, "No, I'm your Guardian..." And my questioning glance she continued, "I believe you would refer to me as a lawyer."

[meg_evonne]

My head hurt.  I guess being eaten body and soul followed, followed by what?  Regurgitation?  I was glad I'd been out at the time.  Now this gorgeous piece of ass in leather was going to be my "guardian" or "lawyer" or whatever?  I started to ask her what the heck was going on because I was seriously lost sticking the events into any logical order, when the huge double, gothic arched door at the end of the alleyway between the cell rows perched atop a short series of steps blasted open.

Two giant grizzly bear minions, blood stained teeth barred drug something, correction someone through the doors.  The body bounced off the stairs as they pulled it along and she was swearing up a blue streak with a voice I recognized. 

I pushed my "lawyer" aside and grabbed the iron bars of my cell swearing, “You bitch.  You rotten damned bitch."  I shook the bars and growled out my anger and my frustration, kicking at them for keeping me from tearing apart my recent friend.  "What the hell did you have to drag me into whatever you've been doing?  Debbie, I'm going to pull you apart." 

At my voice, Debbie's swearing stopped abruptly and her black cropped hair framed a lighter toned face than my lawyer with brilliant green eyes.  Her mouth was large and cracked open into a huge smile, despite being held upside down by the grizzlies.  "JOEY!  Hey good to see you."

"Good to see me, my ass!"  I followed her as the grizzlies carried her down the cell row.  One grabbed her and tossed her over its shoulder as the other opened the cell across the way with the man in the hat.  Even as mad as I was at her, I had to admit that her ass looked pretty good.  She was still upside down, looking back at me.  Geez, back to reality--Joey...  "You set me up, you bitch!  I've been eaten by something called a Message Hound and vomited back to life, I'm on trial, and I refuse to be hung without at least knowing what it's all about." 

"Poor Joey.  Can't figure anything out huh?  Hey, what happened to your clothes?"  The jeans had more or less disintegrated when I attacked the cell wall, splitting and falling off.  She giggled and I hit one of the bars so hard my fist crunched.  Sort of tough to look angry when you're naked and nursing your aching hand.   It didn't help that the man in the hat started laughing at me as well.   

The grizzlies dumped her in the cell, more or less on her head, but Debbie bounces.  Yep bounces back from injuries fast, bounces back from failed love fast, bounces back when you sock her.  She was a fracking bouncing beach ball.  I used to love that about her. The grizzlies locked her in and disappeared back up the steps and out the door, slamming it shut behind them.

My "lawyer" smiled, "Well isn't this a happy family now?"


 

[Qualapec]

My "lawyer" smiled, "Well isn't this a happy family now?"

I disregarded her and turned to Debbie. In all truth I was torn. A part of me wanted to hit her. To grab her, shake her shoulders and scream at her for getting me into this mess. I didn't want to die, you see. And I'm not one of those heroes that is used to people trying to kill him, so I was under a great deal of stress. But I didn't. I didn't because that wouldn't accomplish anything, and I knew that if we were getting out of this situation she was the one who was going to have to do it. Either her or the guy in the hat. I figured antagonizing them was far from my best interests.

That and...I didn't want to hit her. Even though she'd dragged me into this, I didn't want to cause her any pain. Dare I say, I still cared about her. And you don't hurt people you care about, especially if you don't know why they threw you to the wolves.

The man in the hat spoke up while we stood there in shock, apparently my previous guess of him being asleep or dying were both wrong. He practically sprung to his feet and waved cheerily over at us. "Hey! Debyone!" Debbie, I assumed, "How're you doing?"

She shrugged, "So-so. Business is slow."

He laughed again, "Yeah, but I didn't think you'd steal the Wildflower. Hell! I wanna know how you pulled it off!"

Debbie smiled back. "Oh Andre, you know me, I may be skilled, but I'm not stupid. I would never steal it from the Imperial Palace."

I disregarded Andre in the severly out-dated hat and asked the question that had been bugging me, "So you didn't take it?"

"Oh, I took it all right," She grinned defiantly at my court appointed attourney, "Just not from the Imperial Palace. It kind of...fell in my lap afterwards." She turned to me, no longer mocking, but sorrowful, "Joey. I'm terribly sorry you were pulled into this. I needed a safe place to hide it, and I didn't think they would look for it on Earth."

"Oh, dear Debyone. How naiive you are." Andre said, "The Wildflower is our life source. The search has become far and wide. The King is doing whatever he can to get it back," he ran his thumb over his throat in a menacing way, "You know, lest the Emperor exact in interest what was taken." He gave a wild, ammused chuckle, and I wondered how long he'd been in these dungeons, "As a matter of fact...out of all the people who have had their heads lopped off these last couple days, we're probably the only ones who have actually come into contact with the device in question."

[meg_evonne]

"Oh, dear Debyone. How naiive you are." Andre said, "The Wildflower is our life source. The search has become far and wide. The King is doing whatever he can to get it back," he ran his thumb over his throat in a menacing way, "You know, lest the Emperor exact in interest what was taken." He gave a wild, ammused chuckle, and I wondered how long he'd been in these dungeons, "As a matter of fact...out of all the people who have had their heads lopped off these last couple days, we're probably the only ones who have actually come into contact with the device in question."

I <Joey> opened my mouth to ask a question, all I seem to do this time around, but Andre, dipped his head at my lawyer,  "It-say on the alk-tsay in front of the yer-lawsay."  I clammed up.  My Guardian frowned at me, shot murderous looks towards Debbie and Andre in the other cell and called up the grizzlies to let her out. She exited with them out the gothic doors. 

"You had it, you touched it.  The Wildflower I mean." I was looking at Andre. 

"For a moment in time, yes."

"So you're the one that took it out of the Imperial Palace--not Debbie, thus creating the ‘Off with their Heads’ King?  What'd ya do, get caught with the goods before the great escape?  Did you toss it out a window to Debbie, who,"  I shifted my angry gaze to Debbie again, "just happened to be walking by?"

He signed and shifted his legs to get more comfortable on the stone cold floor, readjusted his hat and closed his eyes.  I'm not sure--but I think the guy actually fell asleep.  Debbie was looking at me like she'd never seen me before.  Geez, what had I been a quick lay?  Then again thinking about it, when you live my life, that's sort of a complement--especially when Debbie looked like the sexiest thing in at least six parallel worlds.  That's all the worlds I’d ever been in; she was pretty damn blasted hot.

Debbie walked over to the cell bars and peered through them at me, "Not bad, Joey.  A little bit off, but not by much.  There was someone else on the inside too and enough said about that for now.  Hey, I missed you."

"Yeah, I bet you did," but my heart did a fast two step.

The gothic doors blasted open again.  Didn't anyone in this wild kingdom, just open a door quietly?  The guard grizzlies were back.  They were intimidating enough, but something tall, skinny, and cloaked in black smoke floated through the door behind them. A stench followed the black smoke that made my dead cell companions smell like roses.  Joey, you are out of your league here so far you can't see the ceiling or the floor.

The tall, skinny, floating figure had a gravelly sing-sing voice that I had trouble understanding at first.  Was it even talking English?  It was agitated, angry, & pretty much didn't look like it planned to wait for the nice trial before loping our heads off.   Debbie backed way back in the corner, out of the light from the lit scones.  Andre's position didn't shift, he appeared to be sleeping but I caught the tell tail tightening of his stomach.  I just stood there like an idiot wondering what else could happen now?  It took a bit of concentration but I finally was able to interpret what the cloaked figure was saying.

"It is not working, one of you have damaged it."  Andre forgot to pretend to sleep and his back straightened up as he sat, leaning against the cell bars. 

Debbie seemed to know what the comment meant.  "You mean someone bonded with it?  It's found its true soul's owner?"  She stared at me in shock and Andre's eyes under his hat opened and shifted to watch me.

"Yes, an unfortunate event, but not insurmountable.  Whoever of you is now Wildfire Bound, will serve the King.  The other two of you will be executed."

Okay, either option didn’t sound good, especially if the ‘bonded’ person in question had to work with the floating stink bomb…


 

 

[GWiz]

Okay, either option didn’t sound good, especially if the ‘bonded’ person in question had to work with the floating stink bomb…

….who turned and guestured vaguely at my cell. The Grizzliess lurched forward and the door popped open. I considered bolting for about a millisecond; the bear brothers looked like they’d run me down before I could get anywhere. Besides, where the hell could I go?
 “Bye, Deb,” I called to her as the Grizzlies grabbed my arms in their jaws. “I’d say I’ll be seein’ ya, but the way things are going, that’s not likely, is it?”
    “I’m really sorry, Joey! I never thought it would come to this!”
   “You never thought, alright. I…”
The bear boys jerked me out of my cell before I could say anything else and drug me down the hallway. I struggled to keep my feet under me as they sped towards the entrance. I felt more than saw the floating goon behind me; of course, if I’d been blind it would have been impossible to miss the stench. The doors banged open and I was blinded by the sunlight. I could hear screaming and yelling, and growling and howling, which did not bode well for Joey-san, I was thinking. With the Grizzlies holding my hands I couldn’t shade my eyes. Then one of them let go and broke into a stumbling run up the stairs. I could see that the stairs I was on now were below ground level; although we were outside, we still had about fifty feet to go before I could see where I was at. I was sqinting up the stairs when Casper the Smelly whatever-he-was went zipping by, trilling a sing-song of twisted syllables. Then something came flying over the edge of the pit our stair was in; actually, several somethings. Big, pale yellow, eight legs, a human-ish torso, and long, green hair was all I had time to see before I was shoved to the ground. A huge, wet splash coated my back and neck. I knew it was blood. I could smell it. I rolled left until I hit the dirt sides of the stairway. I crouched there for a second debating whether to make a run for freedom as the battle raged, or head back to the relative safety and security of prison.

[Kristine]

A huge, wet splash coated my back and neck. I knew it was blood. I could smell it. I rolled left until I hit the dirt sides of the stairway. I crouched there for a second debating whether to make a run for freedom as the battle raged, or head back to the relative safety and security of prison.

One of my Grizzlie guards was thrashing around, trying to defend itself for the last few seconds of it's life.  It and it's eight legged attacker didn't seem to be paying any attention to me, the captive, even thought I was now covered in blood.  The smelly wraith thing seemed to be screeching in that strange sing song way while floating out over the pit.  It was fairing much better then my hairy captors as it seemed to sling little bits of the darkness it was made of at the big green spider men (and woman - one of them had breasts I noticed) and wherever the etherial dark whisps would hit the aracnid's skin would turn black and putrid.  Usually they screamed and would lash out with one of their blade strapped legs or use their more human arms to throw something that looked like honey but would sizzle like acid where ever it hit.  It was one of those honey balls that slapped the wall not 2 feet from me that made my survival instinct overrule all other observations.
      "The He...." I gasped and took off up the stairs as fast as my two normal legs would carry me.  I had to dodge bits of battle once or twice as one of the spider people's blades came flying from down in the pit, as they fought their way down into the prison.  No one seemed to notice the shaking blood drenched captive from below as I stumbled up to the ground level and scrambled on all fours toward the first shelter I could see.  People of all shapes, planes, and nightmares were moving toward the battle zone arming themselves in various ways.  Wheather it was to help the spiders or Mr Fart-In-The-Wind with an attitude, I didn't know or care.

[Qualapec]

No one seemed to notice the shaking blood drenched captive from below as I stumbled up to the ground level and scrambled on all fours toward the first shelter I could see.  People of all shapes, planes, and nightmares were moving toward the battle zone arming themselves in various ways. Wheather it was to help the spiders or Mr Fart-In-The-Wind with an attitude, I didn't know or care.

I found my haven in an overturned vegitable wagon. I crawled under it and hoped none of them would notice me. Something resembling a tomato squished underneath my hand. It was odd, it seemed as though crawling under it had forced me into the fetal position...and based off of the quick, ragged breaths, the fear in my chest, and how the sounds of clattering steel and screaming seemed to just be banging around inside my head it didn't seem as though I would be coming out of that shape any time soon. Oh, and my heart was trying to blast it's way out of my rib cage. So now, I was going to be regressing for a while. There was a point I found myself so out of it that when a large arachnid appendage popped a hole through the top of my shelter, barely missing breaking my neck. I didn't scream, only curled deeper into my position.

Then something even more terrible happened. I don't know how long after the battle started, or how long I stayed there before it happened. The sounds of battle halted. Silence. Just silence. And it was so much worse than the chaos. Somehow, I managed to pry my white knuckled grip from my shoulder and rearrange my spine into a flexible state. After a few moments of phyching myself up I jerkily clawed my way through the loose dirt under my hands. A quick glance around told me that Mr. Ring Wraith had lost, apparently that severed arachnid claw had impaled him in it's way through the cart. The invading monsters had made a circle around the prison entrance.  I couldn't see what they were looking at...but I could guess before I was able to see.

Andre and Debbie. Two of the monsters dragged them along by their hair. I don't know how Andre managed it, but the hat remained on his head. Perhaps it was super-glued. I dared to crawl closer, hiding behind some crushed barrels and another dead bear guard. I was close enough so that I could hear Debbie's, "Hey! There is no need to push. I'm coming!"

A man-spider came out of the circle to meet them, "Andre Ursula...you have taken something from the Emperor. He does not have patience for petty thieves."

"Yeah, well, I can't be that petty of a thief. I did manage to break into the Imperial Palace and steal it right out from under his pointed, arrogant nose." The man was smiling, he had to be mad.

The lead spider didn't do or say anything. There was a jerk of his head. Two more arachnids brought out blocks of wood, placing it before the theives. Those same two started wiping the blood from their large battle axes. The head honcho gave the command, in classic emotionless villain tones, "You have been charged with thievery of the Wildflower. Do you have last words, so that the emporor may spare your immortal souls?"

"The emperor isn't a god," Debbie snarled defiantly. She was ignored.

Andre answered the leader, "Mmm...nah. I'd do it again and that bastard knows it."

The spider, I kid you not, sighed, "So be it." And as he raised his hand my heart lept to my throat.

[meg_evonne]

"The spider, I kid you not, sighed, "So be it." And as he raised his hand my heart lept to my throat."  Why can't I remember to post the last line.... 

I closed my eyes.  I always do in the gross parts of movies and I honestly didn't want to see a real beheading.  Debbie was screaming though.... that got to me.  Not sure what I could do, I pleaded with whatever god might be listening and stood up.  It would have been nice if I'd found some decent clothes though.  I would like to think that I planned it, I hadn't.  As I stood up I brushed against the pile of crushed barrels and they fell in a thundering crash, leaving me naked and exposed.  The spider people all turned, including the grim reapers ready to slice and dice Andre.  The head honcho was wearing a heavy gold necklace around its neck and a ruby the size of my fist on one of his giant fingers. The sun glinted off of it, but he didn't drop his hand as he looked for the cause of the commotion.  Fart-In-the-Wind was gone, which was fine with me.

The assembled spidy people, Debbie, and Andre all stared up at me and I sent up another prayer.  A huge roar sounded overhead and three military blackhawk helicopters came over the largest building with weapons blasting.  Spidy bits were blown everywhere.  Whirling sand was stinging my bare ass.  I really needed a pair of pants. 

I squinted my eyes against the swirling sand and could make out an open door of the middle helicopter.  My Guardian, with my lightsabre in her hands, leaned precariously out of it.  She shouted something I couldn't hear and then tossed it towards me.  I swear you not, that darn thing flew straight into my right hand by its own volition.  Some instinct told me to swing it overhead.  Instantly the weapons fire ceased and those spider people, including the ruby ringed head honcho, that hadn't been creamed in the weapon onslaught, froze and then, honest to god, bowed down facing me.  I was NOT sticking around to figure that one out.

Ropes snaked out of the helicopter from both sides and Debbie, Andre, & I grabbed one each and hung on as the helicopters soared upwards, lifting us up and out of the battle zone.  Having no where to tuck my lightsabre, it was not an easy climb to get into the helicopter.  As my Guardian reached out to pull me to safety, I saw the spidy people below still staring up at me like I was the risen Christ or something. 

I didn't let go of my Guardian for quite awhile and her arms rhythmically stroked my back in sympathy as I shook in reaction to almost dying again.  When I finally pulled back, because I noticed that Debbie was eying me in anger--wait, could that be jealousy?  Andre was apparently feeling his age because he was rolled over on the floor trying to catch his breath.

I looked at my Guardian and couldn't imagine a prettier welcome committee.  "You didn't by any chance pick me up some pants did you?"

She laughed and crossed to a leather pouch, pulling out pants from out of Nights of Arabia, billowy and thin.  I didn't care; I put them on and fastened them with a wide leather belt with a lion shaped belt buckle.  There was even a shoulder scabbard for my lightsabre.  Things were looking up for the first time in a long while. 

[Qualapec]

Things were looking up for the first time in a long while.

"So," I said to my Guardian, "You don't have phones but you have blackhawk freakin' helicopters."

"Oh, I was just screwing with you," She said with that same wolfish smile, "Our world is the closest to your earth. Things like this can exist here where they cannot in the Inner Kingdoms." She prattled on as if I knew what she was talking about.

Debbie sighed in frustration, "Look. The kingdom of Wildfire, where we are, is under the rule of the Empire. Wildfire is a...frontier if you will. It's on the outskirts of the Empire, and the world right next to Earth. The farther you go to the center of the Empire the more effected by magic they are, the farther technologically set back they are due to the overpowering presence of magic. The Imperial Palace is stuck back in...Andre, where would you place them in human history?"

Andre looked up from his hat, the man liked to keep to himself, "Picture China in the middle ages full of immortal wizards."

Debbie nodded, "Oh, right. About like that. And the Wildflower is a great treasure of the emperor. The King was desperate to get it back because he knew it would be his head if one of his people took it and he did nothing to get it back. But then you bonded with it. By the-"

My Guardian cut her off, I wondered if it was just a play to irritate Debbie, "By the King of Wildfire enlisting your services he has something to hold over the Empire's head and keep them from taking away our self-rule." She turned another one of those million-dollar smiles at Debbie and Andre, "Unfortunately it means he needs to make a showing of your friends here."

"Ohhh man! Hey, Debyone, the way she talks you'd think we were screwed or something!" Andre blurted, earning several nasty looks from the other human(oid?) guards in the chopper.

A small smile quirked at my lips, the guy had balls. That was for sure. I mean, he had to, why else would he mock giant spiders sent to kill him or steal something from the Empire to begin with. Either that or my initial assumption of his being totally off his rocker was correct. I caught a glance at Debbie. She was leaning on the floor, staring out at the odd world zipping by below us with the most gentle look on her face. The gravity of the situation hit me. They would die. All because of some stupid political powerplays. I didn't know why they took the Wildflower...and right then it didn't matter.

I couldn't let that happen.

"Hey," I grabbed the attention of my Guardian. I went for power and commanding presence, this was exceptionally hard to pull off since I was still buzzing on adrenaline, it was worth a shot. "So. Here's the scoop sweetheart," I pointed to Andre and Debbie, "I don't to jack for you or your king until you promise a pardon for them."

There was a moment where I could have sworn she was overpowered by the sense of masculenity and heroisim that I attempted to portray.

Then she laughed. "No," She squeezed out between uncontrollable chuckles.

"No?" I asked, shocked, "What do you mean no?"

It took a couple of moments, but she pulled herself back together, "I mean, you don't have a choice and you don't have the power. More lives are at risk than those of two petty thieves. Think about it." She held up different fingers as she finished sentences, "Our world is the next dimensional stop on the way to Earth. We are on the outskirts of the Empire. If we retain power that will keep the Empire from gaining a military foothold here. And I'd bet you can guess what happens if that unfortunate circomstance falls into place." She paused for effect.

"Earth will fall to the Empire."

[Kristine]

And I'd bet you can guess what happens if that unfortunate circumstance falls into place." She paused for effect.

"Earth will fall to the Empire."

I imagined some of the green spider people riding the metro or Mr Smokey-Bad-Smell waiting in line at a 7-11 for an instant before logic told me there would be mass panic on a global scale  - compared to fighting about who was right about God or what sexual positions were obscene and what color of people should be in power - people who were clearly NOT human would present such a huge paradigm shift in every-day reality that it would fracture the human psyche.  Your average Joe Public couldn't handle the idea of ghosts or aliens much less parallel dimensions and magical political take overs. 

This stopped me in my tracks and for an instant I forgot that my rescuer was pretty or that she had just probably saved my life.  For that moment I saw her as only an agent of a hostile government who would mete out an undeserved punishment and kill 2 people to make a political showing.  It seemed so wrong but I didn't see a way around it either. 

"my cooperation should be good for something..." I muttered darkly, then turned to Andre.  The man looked mildly shocked, like he had been enjoying dozing by candle light and someone turned on a bright light. I was hoping his candor wouldn't quit on me now.  "So what does being wildfire bound do?" I asked.

He shrugged, "It means this plane has connected with you.  circumstances will go your way, things that are unlikely, and a few that seem impossible" he looked meaningfully at the light saber, "might happen if you need them to bad enough."

"what do you mean, bad enough?" I sounded creeped-out even to my own ears.

He smiled crookedly as my guardian jumped in, "He means you can't wish for something, you have to actually need something for it to happen."  She smiled again, "so if you are protected, reasonably cared for, and mostly safe, the connection you have will not be forced to take a hand in things.  You do not have power whenever you want it."

[GWiz]

He smiled crookedly as my guardian jumped in, "He means you can't wish for something, you have to actually need something for it to happen."  She smiled again, "so if you are protected, reasonably cared for, and mostly safe, the connection you have will not be forced to take a hand in things.  You do not have power whenever you want it."

     “Only when I need it, eh?”  Both Andre and the lawyer nodded at my query. I stared hard at the two of them for a moment, then looked to Debbie. She was looking out the window, not paying attention to what was going on around her. She was still as beautiful as ever, and apparently still a sneaky and conniving wench. Why the hell she’d dropped this into my lap was something I intended to find out.
   I grabbed her chin and bored into those baby blues. “Why me? Why drop this crap in my lap?”
   She shuddered a little, hands closing on mine and ripping them away. She refused to look at me when she spoke. “Because it won’t bond to just anyone; A, you have to be human. All the way human. B,” and then she did look at me, and it wasn’t very nice, either. “You have to be male.”
   “Gee, all the way male?” I guess human and male were in short supply in Wildfire. I said as much.
   “There’s a third requirement. You must be a virgin to bond.” This came from the lawyer. I gave her my best withering stare, which she countered with what I assume was her best amused snicker. Well. I was starting to think I really needed a drink.

[Kristine]

   “There’s a third requirement. You must be a virgin to bond.” This came from the lawyer. I gave her my best withering stare, which she countered with what I assume was her best amused snicker. Well. I was starting to think I really needed a drink.

Andre pulled his hat down over his face and settled back against his seat with carefully neutral movements, "That's why they call it the Wild FLOWER." he stated matter of factly.
      I felt a sudden need to be invisible but the world magic I had been imbued with, didn't seem to agree and I stayed visable.  I closed my eyes and tried to pretend this wasn't happening , "How many people know about that...requirement...of the magic?"
     My guardian controlled her chuckling and answered sweetly, "pretty much everyone..." she continued quickly when I turned pale and looked like I wanted to die, "You have to understand this is a legendary power.  Many men who try to take it - it wont have, and the ones who might be...available don't conform to that requirement for long."  She barely stifled a smirk and looked away.
    I looked over at Debbie, "And what if I were to ...no longer meet that requirement?"
    My Lawyer snorted, "Sweetie there aren't too many women out there who want to take on angry magical forces of probability for even the best...." she trailed off to give me an appraising look.
     I gave her another withering glare and considered jumping out of the helicopter.
   

[seradhe]

     I gave her another withering glare and considered jumping out of the helicopter.
   

    The helicopter flew over rolling forests of green and blue and, I kid you not, Mauve. I hardly registered the landscape as I stared out the side, before a sudden realization hit me.
    "Waitaminute," I blurted out, making both my guardian and Andre Jump in surprise, "if this power gives me what I need when I need it. Why the heck did I have to ask for pants when I was being rescued!?"
    Debbie snorted, I declined to glance at her, though the joke seemed to be well known to all but me, because everyone in the 'copter was smiling. "what?" I asked, fighting in Vain to keep from melting into a shy puddle on the floor.
    "S... hehe... s.sorry Joey. It's just, you're in Wildflower now. We don't live with such... rigid rules of decency as Earth has." Debbie snickered as she looked to me.
    I looked down at the pants I now wore. Up until now the feel of cloth around my waist and down my legs was a comfort I didn't know I missed. But looking down at them, I noticed the Fabric was little more than thin Gauze, I'd be better off naked.
    quickly moving to hide myself more, I scowled at the rising chorus of giggles coming from the three of them. "well, ok..." I winced at how meekly my voice came out. "but if I am bound to wildflower the realm, what does this stupid FX lightsabre have to do with this?" I waved a hand, swiftly of course, past the rather beaten-looking handle poking from behind my back.

[GWiz]

"well, ok..." I winced at how meekly my voice came out. "but if I am bound to wildflower the realm, what does this stupid FX lightsabre have to do with this?" I waved a hand, swiftly of course, past the rather beaten-looking handle poking from behind my back.

   “It’s simply a sword,” said Debbie, but she wouldn’t look at me when she said it. I didn’t buy that for a second, but no one seemed forthcoming with an immediate answer. While I was waiting, a couple of other things went through my mind. One, I guess this made me Virgin King of the Universe. Two, I wouldn’t be producing any heirs to the kingdom anytime soon.
   I turned back to the lawyer, “Okay, we’ll leave the saber out of it, for now. But since I have the power, what is my purpose in life? Andre says Wildflower is the key to existence, but in what way? And what the hell is your name?”
   “Kansuchoshoreza,” she replied with a smile. “ but you can call me Reza. Wildflower is more than just power, Joey. It is knowledge and feeling and life all rolled into one. You don’t wield it; your ‘purpose’, if you wish, is to be wielded by Wildflower.”
   “To be wielded? In what way?”
   “Not in what way, in what form.”
   “Could you please be a little more cryptic, this is all way too straight forward for me.” Again, my withering stare and rapier wit was lost on present company. Well, maybe not the wit part, since they all laughed hysterically.

[Qualapec]

“Could you please be a little more cryptic, this is all way too straight forward for me.” Again, my withering stare and rapier wit was lost on present company. Well, maybe not the wit part, since they all laughed hysterically

While their laughter at my perfectly reasonable question died down I was busy pondering the insane series of occurances that led to this. I was trying to consider whether I was incredibly unlucky or incredibly lucky, or some odd combination of the both. It had afterall seemed a completely random occurance that first brought me to Debbie. And I was assuming it was a similar random occurance that had caused her to stand me up, thereby maintaining my flower-ness. So had that all just been incredibly unlucky? Then again...I was alive so far. There had to be some element of good luck too.

On the other hand, if Debbie hadn't stood me up, she wouldn't have come to me to hide the Wildflower. But in a moment a thought came to me. Debbie had moved from her position, and she was leaning against Andre with her eyes closed. I felt a tug of jealousy, but it was quickly thrust aside in favor of my need to know, "Hey. If only a virgin can use it then why did you take it?"

Debbie snapped awake at the question, but didn't answer. Andre remained quiet before using his index finger to tap up the brim of his hat and look at me with evergreen eyes, "While I'll admit the knowledge of the Wildflower is important to your current situation, I fail to see how my personal motives are relevant."

I was annoyed. He knew damn well how his personal motives were relevant, "If you want me to help you then you're going to have to tell me why you dragged me and Debbie-"

"He didn't drag me into this," She said defensively.

"-Okay. Just me. Tell me why you stole it and put my life and the lives of a lot of different people in danger."

"If that's the case then it's only nessessary for my survival, not yours, and according to the lady here," he motioned to Reza, "I'm worm food anyway. So I'm keeping my secrets with me all the way up those damn gallows step-"

Debbie sighed in frustration. I knew that sigh. It usually meant she was fed up with stubborness of the male variety, "His wife is a concubine of the emperor. He could never buy her back so he desided to steal the Wildflower for blackmail."

Andre bristled, and showed the first real signs of anger. He didn't do anything. Didn't yell, didn't scream, didn't make any violent movments, didn't even push her away from him. He just sat there with a scowl crossing his face, and the muscles all over his body tensed. But it was gone in moments, he just flicked the had back down over his eyes and leaned against Debbie. It was a toss up whether it was to annoy me or because she provided a nice pillow.