Where is she then? Did Harry leave her at the estate? He took her with him, I believe. Either way a gentleman doesn't tell... It doesn't change anything, any trust that Harry may had for Carlos was broken the minute he put that tracker on Harry's arm.
The meeting with Lara that Ramirez and crew showed up after is Harry's first visit and he went to that one alone.
He had Murphy with him the second time when they laid out the plan for Thomas' rescue.
And yes, Harry was correct to be angry at Ramirez. Placing that tracker was part of Ramirez's fading trust in Harry.
Neither Ramirez nor Harry cover themselves in diplomatic glory in PT. The time to tell Harry about the Council vote was when he met him on the beach with Thomas. Harry had no obligations at the time and might have agreed to go with him. But instead he drafts Harry into the White Council security team while placing that tracker.
Harry could have not lost his temper and just told them he did not have sex with anyone at Wraith manor, noyfb who I did have it with.
Given what Ramirez has seen is this. He comes to town to meet Harry Dresden, the Winter Knight, and sees him going on a morning jog with a vampire. He tells Harry about the Peace Talks and puts the tracker on him. He then tracks him to Wraith manor and confronts him after he leaves. They argue and both leave unsatisfied with what the other tells them.
And the kicker for Carlos is this: Harry threatens him with Molly. Carlos takes it wrong because they are both laboring under a misconception. Carlos thinks Harry knows all about how he was injured so badly by Molly. Harry has no idea that that happened(this occurs while Harry is incommunicado on Demonreach after CD) and Molly
can't explain it to him because the Winter lady mantle(and probably personal shame) stops her.
So Carlos sees is friend falling in with the two groups that have injured him bad enough to hospitalize him. He's been ordered to monitor Harry by the organization he trusts and has dedicated his life to. It sets up an awkward situation and when he clumsily tries to talk to Harry in an inappropriate time and place, Harry reacts poorly and pushes Carlo's buttons with out knowing and Carlos unknowingly places Harry at the edge of three conflicting obligations.
Harry is justified and Carlos is in the wrong but I can see how they got there and why each feels the way they do at the end.