He decides that maybe he can befriend them, and throws a stick shouting fetch!
I had an idea. I looked around and found a stick (though there were no trees around) and threw it over the animal's heads, telling them to go fetch. They watched it sail over them and then turned around to growl at me again.
I think I just insulted them.
he stays perfectly still and waits for them to make the first move, then shoves his flashlight in the mouth of the immediate threat to life and limb.
I stayed perfectly still after that and waited. The one on my right lunged at me and I jammed my flashlight into his mouth. His jaws came shut like a steel trap, crushing the flashlight and sending me into a darkness that pressed deep into my eyes.
Oh great.
whips out an Uzi and guns the suckers down!!!!
I pulled the gun from my back pocket. This was it. My last chance. But now I couldn't see to shoot them. Damn.
