Writing insecurities and anxiety

[HateEgo]

I'm an aspiring writer like so many others out there across this big blue marble.  I see alot of English degrees and literary professionals—some talented and some not so much—get published and talk about a professor or colleague that contributed to honing their craft.  I feel discouraged when I see this.  I read books about writing.  I study the books I love like a kid who takes his toys apart to see how they tick.  But I can't help but feel inadequate.  I know not every writer has a degree, but I never even finished my English course in college.

I've written some short stories, sure.  Only my close friends have read them.  My problem is that I don't know where to go, on the Internet or otherwise, to get an opinion on my writing or idea except for friends.  No offense to them but I don't want a bias or soft critique.  On the other hand, I don't know of I'm ready to be told definitively to keep my day job. LoL (tried to keep from using Internet terms, sorry)

So here I am.  I don't have much confidence in myself but I want to be better and I want to tell a story or two.  Where do I go? What do I do?  I've heard of seminars and writers retreats but rural Oklahoma isn't exactly a home to many writers.  I hope I've come to right place.

[Aminar]

This is a pretty good place.  Granted I haven't showed my stuff to anybody here, but none of it is ready for that.  As for confidence, I hate to say this but your going to need it.  Getting published is selling yourself just like any other occupation, and if you aren't confident in your work then you won't sell it.  That said, confidence comes with time.  Just remember that if you enjoy it, odds are somebody else will, and that people are capable of amazing things.

[Snowleopard]

If this isn't the right place HateEgo - someone can surely direct you to the right place.
And people here are good about trying to encourage new writers.
That said - Aminar is right - you've got to develope some self confidence.  I know where you're coming from because I tend to be low in the self confidence area myself.
Get to know people on the forum - I'm sure you can find someone willing to look at your work and give you an honest, non-soft opinion.
Just remember - original fiction isn't published on the open forum - because it could be a problem for JB if he happens to see something he was going to use in one of his stories.  He'd have to get rid of it because he couldn't prove he had the idea first.
That said - you can PM people with your stories after you've gotten to know them or post a link to your stories. 
Hang in there and good luck.

[Don]

Just for funsies, I picked up a copy of Jack Bickham's Writing Novels that Sell.  He was the teacher of Jim Butcher's teacher, btw.  A lot of the stuff in the book lines up with what's in JB's Livejournal  (http://jimbutcher.livejournal.com/).  Bickham taught in Oklahoma.

Anyway,  he actually regarded degrees from the English department as more of a liability than an asset.  Those degrees, according to him, have a tendency to lock an aspiring author into a frame of mind that isn't compatible with popular writing today.  His advice is to divorce yourself from a lot of lessons of the English dept and focus on what sells today.

I'm just parroting this information.  I don't have any author cred, but the prevailing wisdom seems to be: "keep writing".  You don't need a degree in English literature.  If you put the work in, you'll improve.  It isn't about outrunning the bear.  It's about outrunning the guy standing next to you.

[meg_evonne]

I wrote for over 35 years and never a single person read my work. I was simply meeting a need inside me. Then, one day, I realized that something that I wrote was damn good, really good. Not ready to be published--but I had reached a point where I knew that I couldn't get better unless I started to put my work out there. It was scary. It was terrifying. I suspect it is very similar to what you are feeling now.

Please don't let that stop you from pursuing what is probably a passion. It will bring you great joy. Simply write. I am willing to exchange pages, if you wish. PM me.

There is more to the being strong warnings posted by others. As you put your work out there, you need to be strong enough to properly judge the feedback that you receive. You have to take something you don't like, and then decide if it was justified, might be justified, or simply is way off base (and it can be). If you try to WRITE to someone else's muse--you will have done yourself no favors.

I wish you well. I will try to find a piece that I wrote on ego and post the thread for you. It was comforting to know that so many others felt the same fears that I did when I started this strange ride.

[meg_evonne]

Here you go. Check out this thread. If nothing else, it will make you smile and not feel alone. Like all JB threads it goes a bit off tangent, but keep reading it comes back again. It was called, "Will the Bear Ever Go Away" and I envisioned it as a children's picture book actually...

http://www.jimbutcheronline.com/bb/index.php/topic,4353.0.html   

One of my favorites was from Matt: No, whatever it is you call the destractions and the things that make you think can't write never go away.  It can be like "A Beautiful Mind", though.  If you pay it no attention it will just lurk on the edge of your senses.  It can only consume you if you let it.

Also Cathy Clamp, (she and her partner have written I don't know how many books together--the szazi series and the Blood Song series) chipped in with her thoughts. Hopefully it will all give you some confidence to not fear what you face as you proceed forward with your writing.

You might enjoy reading some of those early threads. Just request to see the last page of topics in author craft and work your way forward. Some wonderful, thoughtful advise is shared.