The Book of Don't

[Shecky]

Sounds..........yummy?

Philistine.

[Lisa™]

*Fulfills her daily giggle quota all at once* 

You people need to stop doing that to me.  And I'm mostly looking at you, Misters P. Waldorf and Paynesgrey. 

[Shecky]

I would fire off something witty and at least mildly amusing, but my brain refused to come with me when I got out of bed. It's so hard to be smart enough keep cats from playing with the tired old thing when I can't even use it to think on account of its not being inside my head.

[Lisa™]

I can wait.

...

You have zombie cats?  Dude, I'd get that looked into.

[Shecky]

No, no zombie cats. They're just intrigued by small, tortured, squirming critters.

[Paynesgrey]

*Fulfills her daily giggle quota all at once* 

You people need to stop doing that to me.  And I'm mostly looking at you, Misters P. Waldorf and Paynesgrey. 

I shall now blink innocently.  Big precious moments eyes and all that.

[Lisa™]

I shall now blink innocently.  Big precious moments eyes and all that.

*Remembers you said that*

[Maryelidee]

Does The Book of Don't come in hardback?

Thanks for this comment.  It comes the closest to what I want my comment to be, namely, that reading this made my day!  I needed some chuckles and enjoy the other repartee.

[Paynesgrey]

All part of the service, miss.

[Paynesgrey]

For your reading pleasure, I, your humble servanty type fellow, and Scribe to The Elder Mods, have unearthed 3 more verses of the Book Of Don't!  Tell your kids, tell your neighbors, tell the box of baking soda way in the back of the icebox.  The path to enlightment they aren't, but they can help pave the way to a long and prosperous forum career.  Or at least help prevent orneryness a little.

[Enjorous]

Oh snarkmaster, a verse of the book of don't appears twice in the book. Is that by design?

[Paynesgrey]

Cut and paste gets interesting when you've got not one but two cats "helping."  "The Sub Creature pets the keyboard.  No, you fool!  You're doing it wrong.  I shall pet the keyboard."  Cat then walks back and forth over keyboard while I type, and lays down on my mouse and hand.  Makes for real interesting games when I'm playing a shooter, like the kind where one keystroke can drop a plasma grenade at my feet...

Thanks for catching that, Enjorous.

[Enjorous]

I wasn't sure if it was for extra emphasis, but very welcome *bows*

[Paynesgrey]

Fresh off the presses!  A new verse for the Book of Don't!  Be the first to tell your friends about this amazing, life changing, slimming revelation of enlearnmentey stuff!

Amazingly enough, as Jim's books spread far and wide throughout the land, they've increasingly fallen into the hands of individuals who feel compelled to ... correct... the author and "instruct" him on how to do it right.  Neil Gaiman had quite precice and simple response to this.  Here's our low-salt version:

"Don't feel entitled to come in here and try to school, lecture, scold, or instruct the author on what and how you think he should be writing.  You are not entitled to demand that the author (or any other dreamers, shapers, singers, or makers) strive to validate your own personal worldview or causes, rather than simply tell their story the way they feel it's best told, nor refrain from portraying in what you feel is "too positive a manner" some view you do not share. 

If you sincerely feel that other people are for some reason obligated to turn their artistic efforts towards supporting your worldview, or to pursue their craft in specific way to earn your own personal approval, go blog about it or something.  Or perhaps simply consider it to be the impetus to pursue your own, original creative endeavor which expresses whatever social, political, or religious viewpoint you feel the need to see addressed in some specific manner. 

[Snowleopard]

Yeah, verily yeah!!