Author Topic: What do you think?  (Read 1926 times)

Offline Cristoval

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What do you think?
« on: July 18, 2010, 01:59:53 AM »
What do you think of this?

Sixteen year old Wizard/demon hybrid. Foster child who runs away. Learned some basic magic from local practitioners.

I want the young wizard to struggle with the desire for power and the need to use it and his demon's urges.

The vampires try to eat him. The fear awakens his demon. He burns one vampire to death. This offends the local vampire lord. A wizard senses the conflict and moves in the help the young wizard.

He protects a were which drags him into the group's politics.

His mentor who saved him from the vampire attack begins teaching him about magic and encourages him to control his demon.

If you want me to explain a bit more just ask.



Offline belial.1980

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Re: What do you think?
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2010, 02:47:38 AM »
Sure, sounds cool. Have you finished the story? If not then what are you waiting for? Get to writing it! LOL. Actually, I'm only half kidding. It sounds like a neat concept, though it's impossible to really judge a story from a blurb or even a detailed outline.

The only thing I can say is to watch out for the hybrid concept. A hybrid with all the strengths and none of the weaknesses of both species is, in my opinion, boring. Blade is a good example of this. I think it'd be cool if your character found that his demonic powers weren't up to par with a fullblooded demon, and likewise that his magic was limited compared to a pureblood wizard. (Maybe not necessarily weaker, but limited perhaps to darker spheres of magic because of his demonic nature.) Anyway just my $.02.

Again, though, a cool concept isn't much without a story behind it. So I suggest you write, write, and then write some more. The board rules prevent from posting stories but there are a lot of online writing groups you could check out where writers swap stories for critique.

Love cannot save you from your fate.

- Jim Morrison

Offline Cristoval

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Re: What do you think?
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2010, 03:15:03 AM »
Demon side needs time to grow as will his wizard side. As for immunities the demon side will give him some advantages but it won't make him invincible.

There are ways to gain power quickly but it all comes with a price.
"With Age Comes Power" The only way you gain power without horrible consequences. Just practice, practice, practice and hope nothing eats you.

« Last Edit: July 18, 2010, 03:19:28 AM by Cristoval »

Offline the neurovore of Zur-En-Aargh

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Re: What do you think?
« Reply #3 on: July 19, 2010, 04:53:33 PM »
I think that it sounds like it could be good but I am not immediately seeing what makes it distinct; wizards, demons, vampires, weres, to me as a reader what makes this any different from, or more worth my time than, any of a couple of dozen other urban fantasy series out there ?
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