Author Topic: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences  (Read 4208 times)

Offline blgarver

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 543
  • There are three things all wise men fear...
    • View Profile
    • Video Samples
Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« on: February 09, 2007, 06:15:52 PM »
Hello everyone.  I searched for a thread on this topic before I posted this and I didn't see anything similar.  It seems like a topic that we would havet talked about already, so pardon me if there's an existing thread that I missed.

Anywho...

I was wondering how you other writers handle actions scenes and fighting.  Action scenes flow pretty well for me (think wide shots in a movie; the roof scene in Die Hard, the drain chase in Terminator 2, that kind of stuff.)  But close up hand to hand brawling type of stuff always gives me problems.  It just seems to slow the pace down when I describe each punch and kick and movement.  And I don't know enough about martial arts to really know what each move is called.  But even if I did I wouldn't want to fill the scene with a bunch of fighting stances and terms for each move.

I'm in the middle of a big brawl right now where the main char is fighting a big group of people, and so far i'm just doing my best to write what happens.  But it's hard to write with much style when you're describing each move.  So it's like 80% a breakdown of the fight with about 20% storytelling and voice. 

Anyone ever run into this problem?  More importantly, has anyone worked out a way to solve it?
I'm a videographer by trade.  Check out my work if you're a writer that needs to procrastinate.  Not as good as Rhett and Link, but I do what I can.
http://vimeo.com/user1855060/videos

Offline Josh

  • Participant
  • *
  • Posts: 90
  • Scriptor dementis
    • View Profile
    • Through a glass, darkly
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2007, 08:26:20 PM »
Fight scenes can be a lot of fun, but you're right, too much detail can bog them down. If you have twenty pages of detailed layouts of joint locks, nerve pinches (describing the medical terms for the surrounding bone) and angles of fire adjusting for the wind speed and so on, yea...that's a bit overkill. Personally, I find that switching back and forth between those "summarized" portions and the "detailed" portions helps keep the flow jaunty, but adds a sense of the fight being real. Also, one can easily visualize things like punches and kicks, so you can blend a series of thrusts and blocks just by saying, "Jamie threw a flurry of punches at Mark, who backed away time and again." But maybe your character has a special move with a weapon...or some critical hit sneaks in that you really want to emphasize because it turned the result of the fight one way or another.

Also, I would agree that you want to cut down on what you might call the storytelling aspect of it. You don't want a lot of flowery details creeping things along (Mark took a blow to the right eye and stumbled backward like an elephant sideblinded by a train. As he fell, he gazed upon his visage in the lake they were fighting nearby, and noticed the how his skin already was turning a vivid blue and green, and so thought unto himself with no small amount of funky, black, icky depression, Yeah, that's gonna be a shiner.).

I often go for short, choppy sentences that give a sense of action, occasionally interspersed with longer, flowing descriptions that summarize larger portions of time. This way the pacing doesn't get boring, and you can still throw in a few quick details to create some good mental images. Let the reader's imagination work for you, though.


www.jrvogt.com
JRVogt.com
The Fiction Writer's Virtual Toolbox - 150+ links to tools and resources for writers
Follow on Twitter @JRVogt

Offline the neurovore of Zur-En-Aargh

  • O. M. G.
  • ***
  • Posts: 39098
  • Riding eternal, shiny and Firefox
    • View Profile
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2007, 09:59:30 PM »
I'm in the middle of a big brawl right now where the main char is fighting a big group of people, and so far i'm just doing my best to write what happens.  But it's hard to write with much style when you're describing each move.  So it's like 80% a breakdown of the fight with about 20% storytelling and voice. 

Whose point of view is it ?

In main character POV, if the main character's good enough not to need to think about what they're actually doing in detail, stick with what they're thinking, and the results of the fight, with the description of what happens when background and only the bits that don't work, or work suprisingly well, really catching their attention.
 
[ If they're not that good, against a bunch of people, it's either going to be a short fight, or they need some trick advantage which you can foreground in their thoughts instead. Like Indiana Jones shooting the showy swordsman in Raiders. ]

If it's somebody else's POV, you have a pile of options, "Wow, look at that !", or "oh dear, it's going to be me next unless I'm careful", or "how did I get into this mess ?", or "Yeah, right, another boring Protagonist fighting insuperable odds, get it over with already, do I want pizza or Thai for dinner tonight... " would all fit plausible other character reactions there at least as well as  a technical breakdown of your main character's style.

What's the point of the fight ? What consequences has it for people you want the reader to care about, and for the plot ?  Communicate those, and the rest is secondary.
Mildly OCD. Please do not troll.

"What do you mean, Lawful Silly isn't a valid alignment?"

kittensgame, Sandcastle Builder, Homestuck, Welcome to Night Vale, Civ III, lots of print genre SF, and old-school SATT gaming if I had the time.  Also Pandemic Legacy is the best game ever.

Offline blgarver

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 543
  • There are three things all wise men fear...
    • View Profile
    • Video Samples
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2007, 10:22:37 PM »
Well, it's 3PL, so it's from the main char's pov right now.  And he's trained in martial arts, but hasn't used any in a couple of decades, so he's got nothing but the fundamentals that have been engrained into his instincts.  And he's old and overweight.

I can already tell I'm gonna have to rewrite this scene, because I wanted to get across his effort to fight.  Ultimately he loses the fight because of his age and poor fitness.  I wanted it to be kind of comical, with Boone, the main character, stumbling around and huffing and getting punched in his fat gut, all while doing his damndest to do kung fu.  But as usual, I'm not a comedic writer...all my stuff comes out dark and melodramatic.

So I think I'll just go ahead and write it the way it's going right now, and then go back and clean it up with a comedic eye.  I guess I should work to create those humorous visuals instead of worrying about what exactly is happening in the fight. 

Anyway, thanks for the input. 
I'm a videographer by trade.  Check out my work if you're a writer that needs to procrastinate.  Not as good as Rhett and Link, but I do what I can.
http://vimeo.com/user1855060/videos

Offline Cathy Clamp

  • Participant
  • *
  • Posts: 79
  • Dances with Segues
    • View Profile
    • C.T. Adams & Cathy Clamp Official Website
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #4 on: February 10, 2007, 12:43:36 AM »
Okay, then--what you need to do is concentrate on what's happening TO Boone as he fights. He's out of shape? Well, a side kick above his hip, even if he doesn't connect anything is probably going to pull a groin muscle (OUCH!) A fist to the villain's face? Possibly a strained rotator cuff (the muscle that surrounds your shoulder joint.) Shrugging will later hurt. Turning his head beyond a 30% angle will probably give him white lights in his vision and make him suck in a sharp breath for DAYS. If he gets punched in the stomach, bending down to put on shoes/boots (even if sitting on the bed) will be an exercise in frustration. And, it'll definitely be chiropractor time for all the joints he'll be knocking out of place. You can, in the morning, have a friend/girlfriend test his rotator cuff in a really easy manner. You hold out your arm at shoulder height, close your fist, point your thumb at the ceiling and try to PREVENT the other person from using the flat of their palm on the thumb to push down your arm. You got a strained/sprained cuff? Oh, you'll KNOW it. It's a drop-to-the-floor-whimpering sort of pain (you can't tell I've had it happen before, right?  ;) )

For the fight scene itself, have him concentrate on the pain each motion causes. His instincts will kick in, and it'll TERRIFY him what damage he's inflicting on his body as his muscles react without his brain's input, causing him to scream in agony. He'll probably screw up the actions because his instincts will expect him to kick or punch X high or far, and he simply can't do it--overbalancing himself.  He'll do a lot more damage to himself than the bad guys, which will be even more humiliating. It'll be like watching Al Bundy from Married with Children fame trying to relive his glory days and scrimmage with the current high school team.  ::) You know he'll give his all, and it's flat painful to watch...

Good luck. Sounds like a fun scene.  ;D
Smiles!
Cathy Clamp
Touch of Evil, USA Today bestseller
Magic's Design, now available everywhere
COLD MOON RISING, coming soon, 8/09. Preorder today!
visit our website to read sample chapters--http://www.ciecatrunpubs.com

Offline Dom

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 255
  • "I can't believe it's not Butters!"
    • View Profile
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #5 on: February 10, 2007, 01:17:24 AM »
I concur with both Josh and Cathy Clamp...

When I write fight or action scenes, I tend to concentrate on what happens to the POV character in sharp bursts of choppy moment to moment detail, staggered with narration, which contains the character's reactions to things that are happening in the fight.  I don't bother with move-by-move playback.*

Somewhere in his blog, Jim Butcher said something about scene setup...and he mentioned something along the lines of 1) the event happens and 2) the character reacts to it.  With a lot more detail, of course, and he's talking on a larger level then one fight scene, but that's what I do in my fight scenes...the fighting moves are not thought about before hand in a lot of detail, they just happen whether they are clumsy like a bar brawl or trained like in a duel between master swordsmen, so I put a line about the action that happened--punching, or running, or lurching, or whatever, then have the character react, then more action, character react, etc.  I also tend to make my sentences choppy the faster or more desperate a scene is, and I tend to use whitespace for effect, such as putting significant actions on a line all by themselves.

But all in all, I just pull out the significant details of the fight, no matter if it's a overall action shot or an in-your-face brawl.  The I put in the things that make the character really react--like, I know that knife, or, that workman's boot on my fingers is going to hurt like a mother, or I generalize, as in, there's so many people hitting me it felt like middle school drummers practicing their drumrolls...on me...with sledge hammers....

* Embarassingly enough, I've found the only time I do move-by-move playback is when I end up writing a graphic sex scene.  Which lets me know I'm shipping my characters rather then writing them, so for me, doing scene-by-scene playback is a good indecation that I'm putting crap in a scene that doesn't need to be there, and I need to edit.  Really badly.  So writing move-by-move scenes is a red flag for me.
- has put $0.10 in the pun tip jar as of today.

Offline trboturtle

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 384
    • View Profile
    • Trboturtle's writing pad
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2007, 12:28:32 PM »
Thios is a fight scene I pulled from a story I wrote based in the Battletech Gaming Universe. The Story is "Running from the Past," and it is about a Commando who has faked his own death and is living quietly on a colony world until Pirates attack the world. Here he is confronting trhe agent the pirates planted.

***

   Jägare watched as Max dragged Andrea toward the shed. Short of the structure, he saw the pirate stop and stare at the destroyed lock. With a snarl, Max sling the rifle over his shoulder and yanked on the chain, sending Andrea stumbling forward. As she got close to him, Max released the chain and pulled out a long double-bladed knife from a belt sheath. He grabbed her by the chin and spun her around so that she was between him and the shed. Slowly, Max forced Andrea into the shed, the knife hovering close to her neck. They disappeared into the darkness.

   The hunter stood and moved to the door. He opened it slowly, just enough to allow him to see the clearing. A handful of seconds later, Andrea came stumbling out of the shed, Max right behind her. He grabbed her by the hair and held up the knife. “All right!” He said in a cold, menacing voice. “I want to see everyone out in the open in ten seconds, or I will cut her throat!”

   Jägare frowned. Andrea was too close to Max for a shot at this distance. He stepped out, his rifle pointing at the both of them. “Just me, Max,” he said in a loud voice.

   Max glared at him. “Jägare,” he said in a low voice.

   Jägare walked toward them, slowly. “I’m here, alone.”

   “Why should I believe you?” Max demanded.

   “Kill him, Ian!” Andrea yelled. “Kill the bastard!”

   Max redoubled his grip on the woman's hair. “You’re the one who removed those ATV circuits,” he said in an even tempered voice.

   “Of course. I figured out the Warhammer was a bluff.”

   The hatchet-faced man shrugged. “It was a good plan. Keller didn’t like it much, but I convinced him.”

   Jägare continued to walk forward. "You can't escape."

   “Stop where you are and drop your weapons,” Max snarled. He held the blade near Andrea’s throat. “Rifle and pistol both.”

   Jägare stopped. He held up his rifle and placed it on the ground in front of him, then unbuckled his gunbelt and let it fall to the ground. “Satisfied?”

   “Take ten steps toward us,” Max ordered, his blade never wavering. “And keep your hands up.”

   The hunter took ten measured paces toward Max and Andrea, his hands held out and away from his body. He stopped about five meters from the pair. “The Brotherhood is finished, Max,” he said. “We’ve captured both dropships, and most of the gang is dead or captured.”

   A flicker of irritation crossed Max’s face, but it didn’t stay long. “The citizens here were more prepared then we thought.”

   “Not really,” Jägare said, switching to Mandarin. “It's just the people here take a real dislike to pirates.”

   The hatchet-face man's eyes narrowed. “A shrewd guess,” he replied in the same language.

   “We found the warrant for you issued by the Office of Special Prosecution, Prefect of Sian,  Maximilian Shanav.”

   “I am impressed. You have been busy.”

   “I also know who Jiang-jun Cho Su really is. Death Commandos don’t like it when one of their own desert.”

   Max snorted. “And how would you know anything about –“

   Andrea snarled a curse as she stepped back and slammed her elbow into Shanav’s gut. And the pirate's eyes widen in pain, she grabbed his knife hand with both of hers and bit his wrist. He snarled a curse of his own and yanked her back. Before he could do anything else, Jägare plowed into both of them, sending all three of them to the ground, Max on the bottom, then Andrea, and finally Jägare on top. Jägare’s hat went flying off into the snow.

   Jägare shoved Andrea off Max and she quickly rolled away, finally free as Jägare landed on top of Max. The slaver slashed at her with his knife, but she was beyond his reach. Before he could slash at Jägare, the hunter grabbed the knife hand with his left and punched Max between the eyes with his right. With a snarl, the pirate slammed a knee into Jägare ‘s ribs. Pain exploded along the ribs, the same area where he’d been slashed during the dropship fight. In retaliation, he hit Max between the eyes yet again.

   Twice more, the knee struck the ribs, and each time, the pain got worse. Jägare third punch was met with Max’s forehead as he raised his head and tucked his chin into his chest. A left cross connected with Jägare’s chin with enough force to daze him. He rolled off Max, and lurched to his feet, his right hand drawing out his own knife from it’s belt sheath.

   Max was already on his feet, a bit bloody, but his eyes shone with menace and his knife was held in a low guard. “Not bad,” he said in Mandarin. “But I was trained by the very best in the Capellan Confederation.”

   “So you say,” Jägare replied with a small smile.

   Max attacked with several short slashes, moving with speed and power. Jägare blocked two slashes, avoided the third and absorbed the last one on his heavy winter coat. He ducked an elbow and kicked out at Max’s knee, which the pirate managed to avoid. Jägare spun to his left and snapped out a spinning hook kick, the heel of his boot barely grazing the pirate's chin. Shanav staggered, but recovered quickly.

   The hunter snapped thrust his own knife toward Shanav’s chest, making the pirate swing his own knife down to block the attack, then hit him with an overhand left that snapped Max’s head to the right. Jägare stepped forward, ducked a spinning slash that neck high, and kicked at his opponent's groin. The slaver managed to twist away, his thigh absorbing the kick, the countered with an open palm strike that smashed into Jägare’s chest. The winter coat and layers of thick clothes dispersed the power of the strike, but it still forced Jägare to back up several steps to regain his balance.

   Shanav charged in, his knife aimed at the hunter’s face. Jägare spun to his right, slapping his opponent's knife-welding arm with his left hand. He continued to spin, intent on driving the pommel of his knife into Max’s temple, but the hatchet-face man ducked and hit Jägare with a shoulder in the stomach that sent the hunter staggering. Before Jägare could recover, Max was on the attack again, hacking at Jägare with a flurry of slashes. More cuts appeared in Jägare‘s winter coat before Max was forced to leap back to avoid Jägare’s thrusting counterattack.

   They circled each other, knives held close to the body. Jägare’s ribs burned, but he ignored it. Small puffs of down were slowly being expelled through the gashes in his coat. Sweat beaded on his forehead before it cooled off in the chill air. “Give it up, Shanav,” he said in English. “There’s no way you can get off planet now.”

   “I’ve got an entire planet to hide on,” the slaver replied.

   “You think the Hunters will leave you alone?”

   “If I kill enough of them, they will. And I’m going to start with you.” He moved in again, the steel of his knife shimmering in the morning light. Jägare’s coat absorbed several more slashes, but he didn’t know how much more it could take. A kick meant to break Jägare’s kneecap smashed painfully into the lower part of his thigh, and only sheer will kept him from falling. Max’s follow-up elbow was knocked aside by Jägare, who then stepped in, and used a shoulder throw to try and drive Shanav into the ground. The pirate managed to break his fall for the most part, and slashed several times at Jägare’s legs to keep him away long enough to roll into a crouch.

   Max glanced over at Andrea, who was kneeling several meters away, trying to remove the collar from around her neck. He smiled at Jägare, then uncoiled himself and darted toward Andrea. Jägare moved to cut him off, but only after a couple of strides, Shanav suddenly darted at him, his knife slashing through Jägare’s coat, shirt and into his skin. In reply, Jägare managed to snap a kick into Max’s solar plexus, the force just enough to make the slaver gasp in surprise, but the follow-up knee to the face was prevented by the pirate's quick reflexes. However, Max wasn’t quite fast enough to completely avoid Jägare’s slash that left a long trail of blood along the right side of his face.

   Each man pulled back, assessing his opponent. Fire burned from the top of Jägare’s left hip to the right breast, and the hunter could feel wetness seep into his shirt. His breathing was ragged, every move sending new jolts of pain through his abused thigh and ribs. Tiredness was beginning to set in, the events of the last day working hard to try and take him under. He fought off the urge to fall down, and just smiled at his enemy.

   Shanav looked more relaxed, though the slash on his face bled profusely. “It appears that I underestimated you,” he said in English.

   “Not my fault,” Jägare’s replied.

   “Ready to tell me where those ATV circuits are?”

   “No.”

   “I suppose I could skin you alive, but I don’t have the time.”

   “You’ve run out of time. There’s hunters in the woods, waiting for a clear shot at you, and Marshal Takezaki is on his way with some militia. Even if you beat me, you can’t escape.”

   Max shrugged. “That’s what they said when I tried to shoot Hyung-Tsei, but I managed to get away then. If I can avoid the clutches of the Death Commandos, why not a handful of mountain men and half trained soldiers?”

   “Why did you try and kill the commander of the Death Commandos?” Jägare asked.

   The slaver shook his head. “Can’t tell you. My master wouldn’t like it.”

   “Your master?”

   “He showed me the way.” Max darted forward, his knife angling for Jägare’s face. The hunter raised an arm to block, but the pirate shot a powerful sidekick into Jägare’s exposed and injured ribs. He bit off a scream and back handed Max across the face as the slaver closed in. But Max swept his knife in an arc aiming to slash Jägare’s throat.

   Just as he did, the crack of a pistol going off as the same instance as a blossom of crimson appeared on Max’s right shoulder. The pirate spun to the right, a flat black blade appearing in his left hand as if by magic. He snapped threw the blade, his target Andrea, who was holding Jägare’s pistol in both hands and trying to line up another shot. The sharp edged missile bit deep into the woman's left thigh and she grunted in surprise and pain. A second missile followed the first, this one hitting Andrea in the right shoulder. She collapsed, blood flowing from her wounds.

   “Stay out of this, Andrea,” Max said coldly. “Or the next one I throw will kill you.”

   Jägare stepped in and slashed at the slaver. Max blocked the first one, dodged the second, and slashed at the Jägare’s knife hand. The leather of Jägare’s glove parted easily, and explosion of agony from the back of his hand was intense. The sudden pain made his hand open, letting his knife to fall to the ground. Max hit him with a left hook to his already damaged ribs, then a straight right to the point of his chin.

   Jägare felt the corners of his mind black out as he fought to stay conscious. He experienced the coppery taste of blood in his mouth and breathing became a problem. His eyes were unfocused and he felt the blood pound in his ears. He felt drained, wanting nothing more then to lie down and sleep.

   “A valiant attempt,” Max said. “But you couldn’t have beaten me. Master Sun told me once I was the fourth best fighter he had ever trained, and the other three are dead.”

   The name Master Sun reached deep into Jägare’s memories. The Death Commando’s melee weapon and unarmed combat instructor. Seventy years old and still could move with the swiftness and lethality of a cobra. Jägare had learn a lot from the old man, including a few things not normally taught. He just needed a few seconds to regain his senses. “Did. . .did you kill them too?” he gasped, trying to sound more hurt than he was.

   Max shook his head. “One's retired, one died during the raid on Kathil back in ‘29, and the last one was lost on a mission in the St. Ives Compact several years back. I had no need to kill them.” he stepped forward. “Time to die.”

   The thrust was underhanded, and aimed for his solar plexus. With a burst of energy, Jägare slid to his left and hit Max in the face with the hardest palm strike he could muster. The slaver’s nose deformed under the blow, and for a heartbeat, Max’s brain was in shock.

   Jägare’s hands grabbed the pirate’s extended arm. His right hand seized the elbow, his thumb digging into the pressure point in the inside of the joint, while his left hand gripped Max’s knife hand and twisted. Before the pirate knew what had happened, Jägare drove Max’s hand, still holding the knife, back into the slaver’s body. A stunned look came across Max’s face as the knife went deep into his own body.

   “By the way,” Jägare hissed into Max’s ear in Mandarin. “Master Sun also taught me. I’m the one that went missing from that mission into the Compact five years ago. Lost at sea during the insertion, or so they think.” A look of comprehension crossed Max’s face, just before the high pitch crack of a rifle was heard. Something slammed into the mortally wounded pirate’s back and he slumped to the ground, his eyes open and unseeing.

   Jägare stumbled away, taking several steps before he fell down. The cold wet snow felt soothing on his face, but he managed to push himself onto his back so he could breathe the cold air. He heard shouts and the sounds of footsteps in the snow, but all he saw was a clear blue sky with a few high clouds. He tried to raise his head, but the effort was too much. With a groan, he waited.

***

I thought it easier to show you the way I wrote the scene instead of trying to describe it. A mix of detail and general descrpition. I shoukld mention that the larger a battle is, the less detail there's going to be. After all, if the scene involves a major battle, like the WWII's Battle of the Buldge, the grunt on the ground isn't going to know what happened two miles away.

Craig
Author of 25+ stories for Battlecorps.com, the official website for Battletech canon stories.
Co-author of "Outcasts Ops: African Firestorm," "Outcast Ops: Red Ice," & "Outcast Ops: Watchlist"
http://thebattletechstate.blogspot.com

Offline blgarver

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 543
  • There are three things all wise men fear...
    • View Profile
    • Video Samples
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2007, 03:03:32 PM »
Awesome input guys...

After reading these posts, I went to Borders and rewrote the entire chapter in one sitting.  That's a pretty good haul for me. 

I ended up taking bits and pieces of everyone's advice.  The chapter is actually the build up to the fight.  He gets pinned against a building and is just concerned with protecting his head.  And then I go inside his head and the internal conflict he is having about fighting these people, because they are all familiar to him, and there're women and children; people he's spent most of his life looking after and caring for.  So he does some thinking as they pound on him, and finally comes to the conclusion that if he does nothing, the mob will tear him apart.  And then he reaches out, breaks a little girl's arm, and that's where the scene cuts off.

I decided to switch the actual fighting to the POV of a pair of characters that are coming into the scene.  That way I can describe how ridiculous Boone looks trying to do martial arts.  If I was in Boone's head, he wouldn't be thinking about how stupid he looks, only about fighting and surviving.  But these other two characters aren't in the fight yet, so they can view it and give me a chance to really get across the awkwardness of Boone's movements.

BTW, all the townspeople are possessed by this demon-like guy disguised as an Englishman.  I don't want anyone to ban my book before I even finish it because there's some violence against children. :)  They're bad guys, it's alright.

Thanks for all the help!

BLG
I'm a videographer by trade.  Check out my work if you're a writer that needs to procrastinate.  Not as good as Rhett and Link, but I do what I can.
http://vimeo.com/user1855060/videos

Offline Velkyn_Faer

  • Participant
  • *
  • Posts: 36
    • View Profile
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #8 on: February 11, 2007, 10:11:09 PM »
Another thing, though it seems late for me to put it in, is the body can take a bit of damage when your adrenaline is up. While I know matrial arts classes and fights aren't as brutal as the streets, there is intintionally shed blood in my studio, and instructors will choke you out if they get you in a headlock (at higher levels). So I know a little bit about fighting. Adrenaline and that instinct to not get hurt is (hopefully) going to get the character moving. Some moves become smoother, some choppier as your mind races on what will put your opponent down the fastest. A lot of the fancy things in cheap kung-fu movies are just fancy camera angles and stuff that looks cool. A lot of the attacks I've learned when up close and personal are done on a small level. Grip his shirt here, twist your wrist a fraction on an inch, and set your feet. And BOOM, he's screaming in pain. There's no spurting blood, just a single pinched nerve that will have them on the ground without resistance.

Nevertheless, is sometimes comes down to who can hit the hardest. A full-on punch can put someone down just as easily as a fancy pressure point.

I do realize that this isn't as much about writing the scene as it is about fighting, but knowledge of both is what makes it good (in my opinion). My only words of advice are to keep it simple and keep it real. It appears you've gotten what you're looking for. Good luck/job!

Velkyn

Offline blgarver

  • Conversationalist
  • **
  • Posts: 543
  • There are three things all wise men fear...
    • View Profile
    • Video Samples
Re: Action Scenes / Fight Sequences
« Reply #9 on: February 12, 2007, 04:24:08 PM »
Another thing, though it seems late for me to put it in, is the body can take a bit of damage when your adrenaline is up. While I know matrial arts classes and fights aren't as brutal as the streets, there is intintionally shed blood in my studio, and instructors will choke you out if they get you in a headlock (at higher levels). So I know a little bit about fighting. Adrenaline and that instinct to not get hurt is (hopefully) going to get the character moving. Some moves become smoother, some choppier as your mind races on what will put your opponent down the fastest. A lot of the fancy things in cheap kung-fu movies are just fancy camera angles and stuff that looks cool. A lot of the attacks I've learned when up close and personal are done on a small level. Grip his shirt here, twist your wrist a fraction on an inch, and set your feet. And BOOM, he's screaming in pain. There's no spurting blood, just a single pinched nerve that will have them on the ground without resistance.

Nevertheless, is sometimes comes down to who can hit the hardest. A full-on punch can put someone down just as easily as a fancy pressure point.

I do realize that this isn't as much about writing the scene as it is about fighting, but knowledge of both is what makes it good (in my opinion). My only words of advice are to keep it simple and keep it real. It appears you've gotten what you're looking for. Good luck/job!

Velkyn

I wrote the next chapter yesterday, chapter 14, in which the other two characters come in and see Boone fighting.  This was much more effective at showing the clumsiness and desperation of Boone's moves.  And it was a lot of shoving and throwing, just to nuetralize the attackers.  I tried to keep it as real as possible.  I left out any fancy martial art stuff, because as you said, this is a situation where he's fighting to stay in one piece.  It's all about survival, so he doesn't really think about the moves he's doing or if he's in good form (which he isn't, because he's overweight and out of shape) or if he's even doing a genuine kung fu move...I left it that he is just fighting, and here and there his training comes out in a graceful jab or kick.

The fight scene, which I have been dreading since I thought of it, came out very nicely.  Not over the top, not too Jackie Chan-ish, and I think it's slightly humurous.  Two chapters in two days...that's the best progress I've ever done.  And I'm about 5 chapters from the end. 

And so the show goes on...
I'm a videographer by trade.  Check out my work if you're a writer that needs to procrastinate.  Not as good as Rhett and Link, but I do what I can.
http://vimeo.com/user1855060/videos